this post was submitted on 22 Jun 2025
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I wish I had the whole story, but Gramps divorced Grandma and moved to San Francisco. Joined a band. Did a little drag. Found a wonderful partner we all knew as Uncle [Harvis] and they were together forty years before Gramps passed (cancer. None of the polycule were HIV+ through some "small" miracle). When I was in high school Gramps came out, and we were all "thank you for trusting us enough to share this with us, but like we kinda figured what with you only having one bed" Then they added a clown (who was also an excellent cook, not using clown as an pejorative here) to the relationship. And then a failed businessman who got eaten by Amway. And then a former preacher. I had seven grandpas when Gramps finally passed and I was 15 before I realized my family was unusual.
I don't tell my other two (cishet. Feels kinda weird that I have to specify but the other 5 are not) grandpas, but the ones in the polycule have always been my favorite, especially Gramps. They knew healthy ways to feed my transgressivosity gland. My favorite holidays growing up were the ones we spent at their house, even though they didn't have all the fancy toys. No, they gave attention and treated like real (though little) human beings without fail. Actually listened to the words coming out of our mouths instead of tuning us out.
So I get you were probably hoping for a different perspective, but I think they had a great relationship and they helped me figure out how to be a good spouse by mere example.