this post was submitted on 28 Nov 2023
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[–] Smoogs@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What if your nature is in constant problem solving mode, my life and work revolve around solving problems so it’s a natural neurological pathway.

If that’s why you’re problem solving then your urge Problem solving is for you and about you . Not for them. If you’re making room for someone in your life that means letting things also be about them.

Should someone like that work overtime to suppress how they think about a situation, and stay quiet

Again: making it about you and how it’s inconvenient for you.

until they formulate some method of discussion and acknowledgement of the problem, without offering solutions?

Sometimes it is about them finding their voice. And at times it’s about letting them learn. It can be empowering for them to grow.

You might offer help when asked or when you know someone definitely is incapable. But let others have their space and their journey too especially if you know they are capable.

Problem solving is sometimes a problem in and of itself especially in situations of where it’s enabling or stifling others or stopping you from connecting to them.

[–] TangledHyphae@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I guess then I should just stay quiet and keep doing whatever I'm working on while listening passively.

[–] Smoogs@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Listening actively comes in more than one description. Cmon it cannot be painful to be there for someone else. Stop being obtuse on purpose. That’s just acting in bad faith.

[–] TangledHyphae@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

I think it comes down to the balance, most people want me to listen but do not care to listen to me. It is generally a selfish thing to demand from me my full attention without reciprocating. That is not bad faith in that case.