Ask Jesus

I've heard a few variations of a story in which you had an altercation with a fig tree. I doubt that an upstanding saviour such as yourself would get upset without just cause, so what really happened between you and that tree? Is the slogan "Jesus Hates Figs" just hyperbole, or is there something nefarious going on with fig trees in general? Do you have any other fruit recommendations? Thanks in advance for clearing this up!

When the world needed you most, you vanished.

...did you ever just miracle whip up a chair but claim you carpentered it?

Hello Jesus,

I recently found myself in a situation. I ordered 3 Drachma of copper from a well known copper merchant in my area, who goes by the name El-Nasir. However, despite receiving the copper, I find that it's quality is sub par and foul. What should I do?