this post was submitted on 19 Aug 2023
229 points (91.9% liked)
Asklemmy
43859 readers
1602 users here now
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
Search asklemmy ๐
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
- Open-ended question
- Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
- Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
- Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
- An actual topic of discussion
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
- Lemmyverse: community search
- sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
- !lemmy411@lemmy.ca: a community for finding communities
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
She's a hexbear user. We have pronoun tags for a reason. She doesn't state they/them as her pronouns so please edit your post to not misgender her.
"They" is a more general word and does not specify gender. Personally I use that word when I want it to be clear I am not implying that gender is relevant to my statement. It isn't inaccurate and people shouldn't always have to include references to gender in everything they say.
Every. Single. Fucking. Time. I point out misgendering and some cissie has the fucking nerve to argue with me why blatantly degendering women, a common smear tactic among British terfs btw, isn't a bad thing akshually. "oH i'M oNlY dOiG tHiS wHeN gEnDeR iSn'T rElEvAnT", the fuck are you talking about, respecting trans people's gender is ALWAYS relevant, you do not get to decide on this. This is our decision alone, to deny trans people the autonomy over their gendered self expresion and gender recognition is a textbook case of transphobia.
To make this perfectly clear: There is ONE, just ONE, correct response when somebody calls you out for misgendering somebody. It's apologizing and correcting your mistake. That's a tiny thing to do and takes a fraction of the time it takes to argue with me, and it will cause you one millionth of the distress you're up for when you act transphobic in my presence. If she would be fine with being they / themed, she would have given they / them as a second set of pronouns. Why is that so hard to understand?
You write a wall of text an get all worked up just because someone used "they" just to be neutral. No one is going to check your profiles one by one just to know your pronouns. This is the real world, no whatever crazy wuerdo echo chamber is hexabear.
Maybe your suicide rates wouldn't be so high if you didn't get offended for basically nothing. Is not that you get discrimination against you, is that you can handle society as everyone else can.