See, I get that this is a thing, but I don't understand why you just want someone to listen. What does sitting here, looking you in the eye and opening my ears, specifically do to make you feel better about the problem you're having?

[–] IanSomnia@lemmy.world 13 points 8 months ago

One aspect can be validation. They want another person to affirm that their strong emotions in response to whatever unfortunate event occured are not an overreaction. I think women particularly are criticized for "being too emotional" and can become very self conscious of any emotional response that can be perceived as disproportionate to the event that caused it. So when they tell you about what happened they're looking for how you respond.

It might be tempting to think, "I'll help them realize how little of a deal this is by showing them how easy the solution is." But that completely invalidates their emotions. They just need someone outside of the situation to objectively say, "yea what happened to you, that sucks. Most people in your situation would feel the way you feel. You're not weird or irrational for feeling this way."

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