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But then what do you do about those monsters who leave carts in motion, on slopes, leaving them to hit parked cars?

I’m not sure I agree. I think there’s some merit to leaving your cart in a different spot, where it could likely be more convenient for someone than the cart return aisle. As long as it’s secured so it doesn’t roll away, I don’t see the problem there. It’s chaotic good, at the very least.