this post was submitted on 31 Jul 2024
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Asklemmy

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For better or worse. Small scale or large. Personal or shared. What is an event you've experienced that changed the way you act, live, feel, etc. It could be short-term or long. Share what you feel comfortable with. Triumphs and tragedies alike.

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[โ€“] intensely_human@lemm.ee 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I am very sorry to hear that happened to you.

I was punished for not doing enough school work by being forced out of my bed at 6:00 in the morning to go and dig up stumps in the backyard or to pick up a 40 to 120 lb Rock and carry it from one corner of the yard to the other corner of the yard where there was a pile of rocks, pick up a different rock out of that pile carry it to the third pile and then back and forth over and over and over until sundown

Nazi concentration camp guards used to torture prisoners by doing this to them. Many of those subjected to this committed suicide by running into the electric fences or charging the armed guards.

[โ€“] bizarroland@fedia.io 8 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

I clearly remember there was one time when I had a pickaxe in my hand and I was digging up a tree stump for punishment over something and I asked my stepdad if I could get the pickaxe sharpened to make my job easier and he said no.

And then he turned and walked away and clear as a flash of lightning I knew in that one moment that all I had to do was use this inordinate amount of strength that I had and take that pickaxe and drive it through his skull and this current misery that I am in would end.

And I'm glad that I didn't do it, but sometimes when I'm perseverating I think about that moment.

[โ€“] intensely_human@lemm.ee 3 points 3 months ago

Have you done therapy about this?