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What should I do about my parents moving closer. (lemmy.ca)

submitted 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) by Mycatiskai@lemmy.ca to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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A few years back my sister passed away, I'm now the only child my parents have left. They live a few hours away and have for as long as I have been with my partner (7 years).

My parents are planning on moving to the place we now live to be closer to me. This has my partner worried that they will be over often or I will be over at their house more often. Her parents are very far away so can only visit once a year.

My parents are not the kind of people to show up uninvited to anyone's house. They likely will come over once a month for dinner and I will probably go over by myself once a week.

We are both pretty private people so not having anyone over is just how we are and this potential change of more visits has her concerned that our privacy will be gone.

I am also fine with them not coming over often, I like it being just me and her but I do want my parents close when they have medical emergencies.

How do I approach this as currently she is a bit annoyed but taking a more "see how this pans out" attitude?

I don't exactly want to jump the gun and talk to my parents ahead of time to make sure they don't come over often because I don't think they will and it might sour their relationship to her if they think she doesn't want them over ever, even if I also don't want them over often.

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[–] BCsven@lemmy.ca 13 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Do people not like talking or spending time with family? Are you and spouse that isolated that you spending more time visiting your parents worries your partner? Unless parents are toxic, it would be nice to have family around. And as your parents age it is nice to ne able to be helpful to them amd check if they are OK

[–] hanabatake@lemmy.ml 5 points 2 months ago

Yeah, I don’t understand either. Why isn’t he happy to be able to see his family more often? It is great news for when his parents age and when he will have kids

[–] JadenSmith@sh.itjust.works -4 points 2 months ago

They taught OP how to use a spoon and wipe his bum, and he's making it sound like it would be a chore to have a cup of tea with them.
I don't get it either.