this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2023
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Blåhaj Lemmy is a Lemmy instance attached to blahaj.zone. This is a group for questions or discussions relevant to either instance.

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This is an admin post, intended for blahaj lemmy users. Top level posts from members of other instances will be removed.

==

Edit - Hexbear announced plans to deferedate from us.

==

~~After recent events, it feels to me that sentiment has shifted and more people are asking for defederation of hexbear than previously~~

~~I've been doing my best to try and mend bridges and keep us connected, as it's my hope that we can maintain trans solidarity and work with them, despite the friction, however, ultimately, I feel that this is an issue for the blahaj lemmy community to decide, not the admins alone~~

~~So here's what we're going to do~~

~~We're going to leave things as they are for a week. That will give time for things to calm down whilst we see if we can work together. After a week, I'll put up a vote and get a feel for where the community is at in regards to our continued federation with hexbear. That poll will run for a week. If there is a strong will to defederate (a clear majority), then that's what we will do~~

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[–] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 30 points 1 year ago (1 children)

As people have said, I'm trying to maintain some cohesion in trans protective instances. If we defederate then the majority of trans protective instances will be isolated from each other, and I don't want that to happen. I am absolutely giving hexbear more slack for that reason.

[–] neuracnu@lemmy.blahaj.zone 17 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I was listening to a podcast the other day ( https://www.npr.org/podcasts/510282/pop-culture-happy-hour ) and learned about a new phrase: "rep sweats".

When you have a person who is aligned with a specific minority group encountering a piece of media or interest or subculture that provides positive representation of their specific minority group, that there is an inherent pesky need to WANT to like that specific thing EVEN IF it's not very good.

I feel like that's exactly what's happening here with Hexbear. They're self-admitted trolls. But they're friendly to trans people... so we're having rep-sweats about aligning with them.

It's supposedly a sign that your minitory group has truly taken hold in society when one can confidently look at a piece of, say, trans-aligned media and say "Yeah, it's got trans representation in it... but it's not good and I don't like it."

[–] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 31 points 1 year ago (1 children)

We have very much not taken hold in society. We are under attack in ways that are often quite literally killing us, and unlike the fediverse at large, the threadiverse is full of trans hostile folk on generalist instances, many with admins that won't deal with anything but the most egregious transphobia.

I genuinely believe that empowering trans communities and trans folk in the threadiverse is super important in changing that.

Splitting us apart makes that harder, and keeps the threadiverse more hostile overall. Of course, sticking together doesn't help if the hostility is coming from within the house, but my hope is that we can get that part sorted out. Maybe we can't, and if that's the case, we will do what we have to do, but I would like to make the attempt, because I think that in the long term, learning to work with other trans protective instances will empower us all

[–] kristina@hexbear.net 20 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I completely agree. I also feel like blahaj has its own transphobic takes and maybe y'all need more mods / modtools to deal with bad takes like this, which maybe CARCOSA can help you with. I'd also take the vote to defed with a grain of salt personally given how many votes I've seen given out to people who question the validity of peoples' genders. I don't envy you needing to deal with all this nonsense, I got offered mod on hexbear many times but declined cause I didnt want to deal with what you deal with, got plenty going on in my own life.

spoiler

trans unity forever

cat-trans

[–] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 19 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I completely agree. I also feel like blahaj has its own transphobic takes and maybe y’all need more mods / modtools to deal with bad takes like this, which maybe CARCOSA can help you with.

I think you need to make some allowances for volunteer availability. I got to that post in under an hour. The hexbear post targeting me was up for over a day, and was only removed when I sent a DM to an admin, because that's just how it works sometimes. Volunteers aren't available all the time, and the moderation tools on lemmy are far from perfect.

You aren't paragons of perfection anymore than we are. We both have big communities with diverse opinions, and admins that are trying to keep community standards on track.

If you mean it when you say trans unity, then you need to allow for us to work towards it, rather than expecting perfection, especially immediately

[–] kristina@hexbear.net 16 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Oh no, not saying you aren't trying or to get it immediately, sorry if the tone didn't convey that properly. Also fed seems a little wonky rn so theres a lot of delays between posts.

spoilertransshork-happy

[–] Gormadt@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I had no idea the phenomenon had a name

This is a great write up and honestly seems to describe what's going on quite accurately

[–] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 15 points 1 year ago

It's not. I have no time for hexbear political views. I don't like their politics just because they're trans. What I do like, is their strong pro-active protection of their trans userbase. And to me, that is more important than political differences.

Of course, not everyone shares that opinion, but that's why it's a vote, and not me going with my own opinion.

[–] Franzia@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I hope you dive deeper into the podcast rabbithole than NPR someday soon.

[–] neuracnu@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

What makes you think I haven’t? I mentioned learning something new, and provided a citation.