this post was submitted on 10 Mar 2025
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Are you sure it’s that rare? Off the top of my head I can think of 4 I’ve known personally, plus all the trans people online that I follow (shout out Jimquisition, Contrapoints, and Philosophy Tube). It’s not that rare, unless you live in a place full of bigots, then yes, I bet they don’t come around or stay in the closet. Not a whole lot of gay kids in my highschool, not because no one was gay, because they’d bully the shit out of you if they suspected you were gay. So ymmv depending where you’re at.
Online, sure, love Contra over on YouTube, etc. We talk to Germany too on the daily, here, even if you happen to be in rural Iowa and have never ventured further than 50miles from your house.
I was talking in bell curve broad strokes physical, real life, can touch hands, friends and family. Still, personal circles can expand not just by individual people but by community. Once you’re in with a community-reliant individual, the community factor will often trigger and you will meet more such individuals. I experienced this with what was the more obscure gay scene back in the 90s where you’d go from having one gay friend to suddenly having an entire friend group. Or, if you live in an ethnically or racially self-segregated area, you may experience the same thing with those communities. You have your friend, who gives you a “nod” of sorts, and then you find yourself socializing with a community and maybe making new friends who might not have spoken to you at all without that “nod”. Community vetting, for safety.