I'm afab and if the surgery was possible for turning what I have into a fully functioning dick, I would have done it by now.
Basically I'm comfortable with my perceived gender, I just wish how I see myself mentally when I think about sex, matched up to what I've got in my pants. I've felt this way since I was a young teenager too, so it's not a phase or a fetish, it's how I've wanted to present sexually for most of my life.
Does this disconnect I'm talking about just fall under the non-binary trans umbrella? Or is it a seperate thing?
Are there any other people here who feel this way?
(Phalloplasty does not appeal to me. The surgery is brutal, it doesn't look right (to me) when it heals, it isn't functional how I would want it to be, and it isn't sensitive like a dick.)
I'm afab, but identify as agender. I have gone through many of the thoughts you've written here, especially if I'm even allowed to call myself trans when it's not exactly feasible for me to get bottom surgery. I'm also aroace, in a similar way that you are
Have you considered trying testosterone? At a lower dose you can still get some bottom growth. You'll also have some of the other changes like thicker body hair, and lowering of voice. I was on T for about four months and didn't have any voice changes, but still had enough growth that I was content. I can go into more detail if you like, and there's some toys out there (and functional prosthetics) that help alleviate some of the bottom dysphoria. There's definitely no right way to be Trans or NB but it helps to have some anecdotal info when you're feeling lost.
The names of their products are really something!
That said, I'm thrilled that something like this exists and am hella curious about its day to day working.