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So, on pronouns. (lemmy.ml)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by shapis@lemmy.ml to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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I have a few questions on how to best behave to be as welcoming and inclusive as possible without sounding bad. I hope you guys don't hate me.

I'm just a straight male. Are my pronouns he/him? Is that how I should tell people? Do you actually tell them as you meet them ? Do I have to wait for a certain social cue ?

How about online. Should I tell people or have it on my personal profile somewhere?

And about respecting other people's pronouns. How do i figure them out ? Is it a big faux pas if I don't before I know them ? Is it a faux pas if I refer to someone I just met and I assumed to be male as he/him?

I've never seen anyone referring to anyone irl by non conventional pronouns. Is it an actual thing or is it currently being pushed to make the world a more inclusive place?

I'd love some help with all of this.

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[–] wintermute_oregon@lemm.ee 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (21 children)

I don’t tell people my pronouns. I’m male. I look male. I act male.

I appreciate when people are questionable or want to use different pronouns tell.

I equally appreciate when people don’t ask mine.

[–] TankieCatgirl@hexbear.net 18 points 1 year ago (18 children)

Can you explain what it means to look and act male? And why you don't like having people ask yours?

[–] wintermute_oregon@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (17 children)

In 6’2, 225 pounds with about 10% body fat. I look like a man. I act like a man. Nobody has confused me for anything but a man.

It’s rude as it implies I don’t look or act like a man.

It’s why women are drawn to me. As my gf says, I wanted you because you’re all man. My last gf said the same thing.

[–] MaoWasRight@lemm.ee 0 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I'm sorry. You may be getting it all wrong because right now you just sound like and are acting like a big ol pussy.

[–] TankieCatgirl@hexbear.net 13 points 1 year ago

Gonna have to call out the misogyny of calling someone a "pussy".

[–] wintermute_oregon@lemm.ee 0 points 1 year ago

Thanks. You appear to have yourself confused with someone who matters.

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