309
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[-] HelixDab2@lemm.ee 1 points 7 months ago

Who cares if most people don’t love you for who you are?

Given that the overwhelming emotion that I've seen expressed by most other people that are also on the autism spectrum is loneliness, I'd say: most people. You don't feel lonely? Good for you, I'm happy for ya. Most people that are high-functioning autistics--formerly Asperger's--express feelings of isolation, of loneliness, of wanting to have some kind of romantic connection. Not being able to find people that care about them for who they really are is a serious problem.

I'm going to make a guess and say that you've never had the moment of realization that you cared deeply for someone, that you loved someone, but that they simply didn't feel the same way about you. ..And then repeated that experience countless times.

Why care what the people who don’t like you think when there are plenty of people who do?

It's like, if you're straight, then roughly 48% of all the people that you meet are at least theoretically in your dating pool, because right around 48% of people are the opposite sex and are also straight. If 1:1000 of those people would be suitable a suitable romantic partner for you, then there are roughly 163,000 suitable romantic partners in the US for you. Heck, roughly 8, 500 of them would be in metro NYC alone. So, in theory, it's 'easy' to find a potential romantic partner. If you're gay or lesbian, that drops to roughly 2% of all people to start (roughly 4% of all people are gay or lesbian, and it's a roughly equal split by gender), which means that your potential nationwide pool is 7,000. If you're trans? Well, that's even lower then.

If you're on the autism spectrum--which is about 2.8% of people in the US--you're going to have a much, much harder time finding people that you can connect with in the first place, just because you're outside of the acceptable range for friendship for most people. Yes, there will be some people, but far, far fewer, and consequently harder to find. If your constrained interests are not a 'popular' one with people that are on the spectrum? Well, good luck then; you may never find someone that you can share a deep connection with.

So, yes, if I had been given a choice to have been born neurotypical, I absolutely would have taken that.

this post was submitted on 09 Oct 2023
309 points (79.0% liked)

Autism

6525 readers
8 users here now

A community for respectful discussion and memes related to autism acceptance. All neurotypes are welcome.

We have created our own instance! Visit the following community for more info:

Our Community

Values

Rules

  1. No abusive, derogatory, or offensive post/comments e.g: racism, sexism, religious hatred, homophobia, gatekeeping, trolling.
  2. Posts must be related to autism, off-topic discussions happen in the matrix chat.
  3. Your posts must include a text body. It doesn't have to be long, it just needs to be descriptive.
  4. Do not request donations.
  5. Be respectful in discussions.
  6. Do not post misinformation.
  7. Mark NSFW content accordingly.
  8. Do not promote Autism Speaks.
  9. General Lemmy World rules.

Encouraged

  1. Open acceptance of all autism levels as a respectable neurotype.
  2. Funny memes.
  3. Respectful venting.
  4. Describe posts of pictures/memes using text in the body for our visually impaired users.
  5. Welcoming and accepting attitudes.
  6. Questions regarding autism.
  7. Questions on confusing situations.
  8. Seeking and sharing support.
  9. Engagement in our community's values.
  10. Expressing a difference of opinion without directly insulting another user.
  11. Please report questionable posts and let the mods deal with it. Chat Room

Helpful Resources

Relevant Communities

Autism:

ADHD:

Bipolar:

Mental Health:

Misc:

Neurodivergence:

Social:

^lemmy.world/c/autism^ ^will^ ^happily^ ^promote^ ^other^ ^ND^ ^communities^ ^as^ ^long^ ^as^ ^said^ ^communities^ ^demonstrate^ ^that^ ^they^ ^share^ ^our^ ^community's^ ^values.^

Lemmy World Donations

The admins of our instance work hard to ensure that we have a good place to host our community. They are also helpful at protecting our community from trolls and other malicious actors. They do this for free, so if you appreciate our community, please consider donating to them. The first link is the preferred method, but both work.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS