this post was submitted on 15 Dec 2023
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Adobe warns it may face massive fines for subscription rules::Otherwise in rude health after posting best-ever results

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[โ€“] RGB3x3@lemmy.world 23 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Can we drop the Adobe executives into the ocean and make them pay for a subscription to a dinghy?

[โ€“] rtxn@lemmy.world 16 points 10 months ago

You're thinking too small!

  • We sell them a cheaply made dinghy for a one-time payment with a 400% markup (it's okay, it has AI features)
  • The lifetime license expires in a few days
  • For continued support, we coerce them into a multi-tier subscription
  • Tier 1 gets them access to some tape to fix the inevitable holes
  • Tier 2 gets them a hand-operated pump
  • Tier 3 gets them one (1) oar and a very nice hand-written letter to thank them for their trust and support

Then I roll up to them in my libre motorboat and chuck them in the ocean because fuck them.