Eat a full MRE the day before. Good luck ever pooping again.
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Give birth right before your trip
what the fuck. i need an update post
I have a friend who was in the army and said they had to do 100+km training hikes. No one wanted to have to stop to poo so the first thing they did, before even starting, was to eat the block of cheese from their ration packs. They called it plug cheese.
Dude, I know you can't say why, but I sincerely hope you come back after your...excursion? And update us all with the results. And may e tell us why when you have the chance.
Just coming in here and saying you can't shit for 3 days. What on earth is this.
Op is gonna meet their stinky penpal in person and wants to save a special gift for when they get together, how romantic ๐
I'm pretty Sure you are a Woman going on a hike for multiple days and you don't want to poop in the wild? These problems sound quite familiar xD
Leaving a comment to be part of Lemmy history.
It's called a low residue diet https://badgut.org/information-centre/health-nutrition/low-residue-diet/
This post is truly glorious, this should be the founding exhibit of the museum of Lemmy.
I am truly grateful to witness this moment.
In case OP is still with us, my advice would be anti diarrhoea medication, consume minimum liquids, avoid fibre, pack MREs which are often formulated to be a bit constipating. But above all, question why on earth you would be doing this in the first place!
I wonder how he will behave as soon as the first thing the date does in the tent is, unceremoniously, going for a poop.
If you don't wanna partake in illegals ie opioids, you can give immodium a shot. It's anti diarrhea stuff. Just take more than it says lol it will def stop you up. I would also just eat bare minimum. Trail mix or smth. Also drink less water.
I used to take immodium for multi-day concerts where I expected to be drinking a lot of beer. Last time I did so, it worked so well that I didn't shit for two weeks and stopped being able to sleep. Had to get to the doctor for a powerful laxative cocktail that really messed up my guts for another two weeks during which I still could barely sleep for different reasons. I'm not getting that month back.
This post is gold. To parrot a couple others, anti-diarrhea medicine always locks me up for a day or two
You're going to end up needing a knife...
You could try surviving on Soylent or an equivalent. It's the nutrients you need to stay alive and operating normally stripped down to the bare minimum (so less material for you to have to poop). It might be diluted in water but that could be minimised and that small amount would probably leave you though sweat/breath anyway.
Honestly, the edits didnโt clarify much. Iโm nearly as confused by this whole situation as I was the first time I read the post
Just tell us the reason.
Just don't eat anything. For three days you should be fine. If your stomach hurts just drink water.
Are you planning to film one of those "shipping myself in a box" videos? ๐ญ
lol this is hilarious, and I also hope you're okay, OP!
Now, some say this is the first Lemmy meme. I'm not sure that's the case, for what it's worth. However, it does feel exciting to see a meta moment like this! So absurd! ๐
I was here witnessing lemmy history being made and I will probably die of curiosity if we do not get an update. I do not have any tips. I just hope that you come back safe and sound.