[-] cobysev@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

American here, who has spent about a decade living in various countries around the world.

The biggest problem with my fellow Americans is that we're raised in an isolated country, which only borders two other countries (Canada and Mexico). And our country is so massive, probably 90% of Americans don't live anywhere near either country border.

Crossing borders is a big deal too; it's not like Europe where you can be driving and suddenly see a sign welcoming you to a new country. There are checkpoints, blockades, passports, regular inspections, etc. Especially since 9/11 happened, our borders have become even more locked down. Plus, going anywhere else requires expensive plane tickets to fly over the oceans.

This leads to most Americans having no social interactions with foreigners most of the time. We're fully ingrained in our own culture bubble and we don't get a lot of interaction with other cultures, outside of stereotypes through pop culture.

Combine this with the fact that we're taught from childhood that we're the "greatest nation on Earth," and you get an entire culture of entitled, narcissistic jerks who think the American way is the best way.

Our education has been failing for decades now, thanks to politicians on both sides of the aisle realizing that we're more easily manipulated if we're less educated. So there's this race to the bottom, where we're being fed lies and embellishments about how great America is and how we're this amazing country that the rest of the world looks up to and admires.

With this entitled world view, it makes Americans scared when foreigners come to our country because we only know of their culture through stereotypes and we fear their culture taking over our "amazing and most perfect country." Just as we've stepped into other countries and spread our own democracy, we're afraid other nations will attempt to do the same to us.

It doesn't help that we have an entire political party who maintains their voter base through fear mongering about foreigners taking our jobs, stealing our women, and destroying our "great culture" for their "backwards and corrupt" values. It's complete lunacy, but to the average American who has no regular contact with the outside world, it seems plausible.

So yeah, a lot of Americans get uncomfortable when foreigners speak their native language around us instead of English. They tend to find it rude at best, and offensive/dangerous at worst. And some of the worst Americans travel abroad and expect everyone to essentially worship the ground they walk on, so they get offended when other people don't know or speak English. It's a really messed up world view, but it's hard to change when we live such isolated lives.

[-] cobysev@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

My name's Coby. Close enough. People call me Colby all the time.

[-] cobysev@lemmy.world 23 points 4 days ago

I used to use Gboard. I still do, but I used to as well.

It used to be my default. Every time I got a new android device, I would immediately install Gboard before doing anything else.

But lately, it's been garbage. It's been getting words wrong that I never had problems with previously. It randomly capitalizes normal words in the middle of sentences and I can't seem to train it not to do that. Like "Ever" is the standard capitalization now. I need to manually fix it every time I use that word.

It's been forgetting my name, which is annoying because I have a very unique first and last name and I had previously trained it to swipe my name.

It's also just sticking with variations of a suggested word instead of giving me words in the same swipe area to select. Like if I swipe "food" and it autocorrects with "good," my options to correct the autocorrect are things like "goodness," "goody," "God," etc.

I'm trying to de-Google my life right now, so finding a new digital keyboard seems like a good idea. I'm gonna try some of the suggestions in this thread. I am definitely NOT recommending Gboard.

[-] cobysev@lemmy.world 5 points 6 days ago

Thinking in terms of words and sentences always felt really slow and tiring, so I took the "picture is worth 1,000 words" metaphor literally and just visualize thoughts instead of using words. I could spend a few seconds/minutes piecing together a scene or conversation with words, or I could just instantly see it in my mind and have an innate understanding of the concept or situation, almost immediately.

Of course, this makes it harder for me to communicate verbally (especially since I'm an introvert), so I've had to spend years practicing conversations out loud. And since I think in terms of images, I'm basically translating visuals to words every time I open my mouth. So I can be a bit awkward and fumble over words sometimes. I spent a lot of my youth just lost in my own head, because dealing with the real world was like trying to translate a foreign language in real time. It was exhausting, so I was just the quiet kid growing up. Kept to myself, for the most part, and just absorbed information about my surroundings.

In the novel Hannibal Rising, they explain Lector Hannibal's brilliant mind as a sort of visual hallway, with many rooms branching off of it. Any time he needs information, he takes a mental stroll down the hall and into the various rooms, where he's filed away all sorts of knowledge. It's how he can recollect fine details about almost everything he's exposed to; he visualizes filing it away in a particular room in his mind, so he can go back to retrieve it anytime he wants.

I always loved that concept of a visual recollection, but I feel it's too complicated a visual for myself in particular. It takes time to take that mental stroll down a hallway and go through files in my mind, so I keep it simpler and try to just jump right to the visual I need. If I can't find it, then I can't find it. Trying to keep mental files of everything just seems like way too much work for me, even if it would work as a shortcut to memory recollection.

When puberty first struck me (about 25 years ago now), I found myself in a strange battle for control over my mind. I felt split in two directions: my intellectual side, which I felt was my true self. And my instinctual self; the impulses that tried to betray the strict moral compass I had in place. Almost a sort of Jekyll and Hyde thing, now that I think about it.

I actually had a mini-struggle with this concept of a mental "self" when I was in elementary school. I was obsessive about details and had to do things in a particularly structured way. But I noticed that my peers were very lax about details and just did the bare minimum to accomplish tasks, sometimes very messily. It bothered me, and I spent several weeks agonizing over whether I should relinquish control and just be a messy, disorganized person like my peers, or if I should keep suffering under my mental structure and discipline. I didn't want to stop hyperfixating on minor details, but I felt like life would be less stressful if I could just give up trying and go with the flow. Little did I know I was already suffering from ADHD, even way back then. I wasn't even diagnosed until I was 37 years old.

But as I started to mature both physically and mentally, that split between being "normal" and being "organized" became my instinctual and intellectual sides, and I spent many years fighting to hold true to my morals and personal beliefs. ADHD won in the end, and I refused to give in to my instinctual impulses all my life. And the older I get, the easier it is. As my hormones and testosterone cool off with age, I get less impulsive drives. I'm more careful and more patient, with less effort.

In regards to OP's mental "depths"... I don't like to avoid topics just because they give me a negative vibe or emotion. I'm a realist, and I've always wanted to understand the world I live in, including the good and bad. I don't want to trick myself into a false understanding of the world; I want to see it as it truly is, so there's no misunderstanding a situation I find myself in.

So unlike OP, who has layers of their mind where they tuck away negative thoughts, I prefer to process and deal with them up front, come to some level of understanding, and then file them away. Once I've processed it, then it doesn't hurt me as much in the future and I'm able to deal with it in the moment without freezing up or suffering from emotional reactions when I least expect it.

It makes me more adept at handling real-world situations as they come at me. Which was really handy when I served in the US military. When you're being attacked by an enemy force, you don't have time to be horrified at the carnage around you; you need to be present in the moment and focused on the next step to survival. If something truly shocking happens, I can set that thought aside while I focus on what needs to be accomplished first. Once everything's said and done, then I can sit down and process that shocking situation I dealt with.

TL;DR - I visualize thoughts instead of speaking or forming words in my head, because it's much faster. Also, my ADHD mind is a battlefield, wrestling for organization over impulses. ALSO also, I'm a realist who prefers to process everything up front, good and bad, instead of just tucking away negative thoughts and emotions and not dealing with them.

[-] cobysev@lemmy.world 22 points 6 days ago

Meh, don't feel confined to the sidewalk. Be adventurous. There's a path to the left there, where others have continued their walk.

[-] cobysev@lemmy.world 149 points 2 weeks ago

I knew a guy when I served in the US military who got caught cheating in a semi-related way. He got assigned to a base in a new state and his wife refused to relocate their whole family for the few years he'd be assigned there, so he went by himself, leaving his wife and kids in his home state.

Turns out, he was sexting one of his younger subordinates at work. One of his daughters found out when she tried to use an old tablet and found out his account was still synced to it. She saw all his texts updating in real time.

He was ultra-conservative and didn't believe in divorce, so he was doing everything he could to save his marriage. His wife forced him to install security cameras in every room of his apartment and banned him from going anywhere after work. She knew his schedule and expected him home immediately after work ended. He was basically on house arrest until his job was done and he could move home.

The last I heard, he told his wife the landlord needed to paint the walls, so he removed all the cameras, dunked them in the bathtub, then played dumb when none of them would work when he set them back up again. He was seen inviting young women over to his apartment after that. So, you know... he didn't learn his lesson.

[-] cobysev@lemmy.world 106 points 1 month ago

She serves as a distraction, so other Republicans can get away with things that seem tame compared to the drama she's stirring up. It's just misdirection; otherwise, Republicans would've ousted her themselves for hurting their party.

Remember when Mitch McConnell was in the news constantly for deliberately halting progress to serve his party's goals? We don't even hear about him anymore; not since Marjorie Taylor Greene and Lauren Boebert took center stage in the shitshow.

[-] cobysev@lemmy.world 114 points 1 month ago
[-] cobysev@lemmy.world 130 points 1 month ago

Personally. I don't consider it a vacation until I'm cut off from everyone and everything. Let me relax in peace for a while, without distractions.

[-] cobysev@lemmy.world 90 points 3 months ago

I was gonna say, you guys get YouTube ads? I'm still blocking them, so I'm still a target for Rick-rolling.

[-] cobysev@lemmy.world 103 points 5 months ago

My wife and I were stationed in Germany for a couple years with the US military. Her only experience with a foreign language was some classes in French in high school, which came in useful since we were stationed near the French border. But while we were living in Germany, we decided to learn some German so we could get around easier.

We took a trip up to Berlin one week and my wife was trying her best to speak to a vendor in German, but she was really struggling. The vendor decided to switch to French instead. Apparently, her German had a heavy French accent, since that was the only other foreign language she had practiced. She was able to finish the conversation in French.

[-] cobysev@lemmy.world 214 points 6 months ago

When I lived in Germany for a while, my wife and I took a train across the country one winter to Munich for the Christmas markets. We stayed in a hostel and walked the streets, enjoying the various stalls. I'd never heard of Glüwein before (hot, mulled, spiced red wine), but it was fantastic! It was an amazing experience and we didn't have to worry about parking lots or figuring out public transportation. Everything was within walking distance and we ended up touring all of Munich on foot.

I wish the US would get off its ass and get some high speed trains set up. We just need to keep oil and auto dealers out of the discussion because they keep shutting it down. Like Musk's "Hyperloop" project, which he proposed to stop legislation from approving high speed trains, but then intentionally did nothing with, so we just don't develop trains to replace his Tesla cars.

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cobysev

joined 1 year ago