Ask Autistic People

82 readers
4 users here now

A community for anyone to ask autistic people questions: non-autistic people to learn about the autistic experience and autistic people to get information or validation from their peers.

Instance description for federated visitors

Rules

  1. Follow instance rules
  2. Text-posts only
  3. Questions must be directed at autistic people
  4. If you are answering a question and are not autistic, please state so in your comment. Otherwise, it is presumed the respondent is autistic.

Keep in mind: Autistic people are a diverse group with diverse experiences and perspectives. Not one represents the entire community.

founded 5 months ago
MODERATORS
1
 
 

I'm trying to see what we look like in NT settings from a 3rd person view. Most of the examples I know are shows about autism specifically, but I'm looking for a more natural NT setting type of thing.

Edit: Looking for a normal show in which one of the main characters are autistic, but autism is not the central focus. My brain feels like it's gunked up lately, so having trouble explaining things. Like trying to run in a nightmare. iassgdgdsflsfd

2
3
 
 

Pictured: Cheese and crackers.

4
5
6
 
 

This is a series I enjoy reading (Hellboy by Mike Mignola) although I read more Marvel and DC before I got tired of both and switched to indie comics like Dark Horse:

I like reading Mike Mignola because his stories are written so well in my opinion and his art style and collaborations with other artists and writers are really nice, probably because I switched from the Big Two (Marvel and DC) to indie comics from Dark Horse and maybe other companies too (Image Comics?).

I had read Spawn by Todd Macfarlane, but put it down because the drama was too much for me and I lost interest in reading it so much.

I personally think Dark Horse is a good publishing company too in my opinion: they publish all kinds of media around the clock.

What are your favorite comics you like to read?

7
 
 

I genuinely open up about this matter.

All my life, movies have usually beaten my senses whenever I watch them somehow.

Anyone could yell and it would affect me but not anyone else whether they have autism or not.

Wherever I went, a movie or show would be playing and people would make me deal with it by refusing to turn it off over other people.

Never mind the things I disagree on with each movie or show…all of them genuinely affect my senses and they always did even right now.

I am autistic myself…does anyone else with autism know how to handle this situation?

8
 
 

I've recently been trying to work out how to describe my difficulty talking about certain topics and trying to find out if this is an autism trait, a common co-occuring condition, or just anxiety. Lacking the right search terms hasn't helped in that regard!

Neither selective mutism nor alexithymia seem to be quite the right terms, although it's definitely connected to topics that carry emotional weight. I can have the whole concept or discussion that I want/need to have worked out in my head, but when the time comes my chest really tightens up and my throat feels restricted* and it's like I have to physically push to get the sentences out.

(*) I know that this is a physical indicator of stress and am very much aware that I am stressed in that situation. However, it's not the way I typically experience stress, though (I usually carry that in my shoulders/back and end up with vice headaches from high-stress situations).

It's similar (but definitely not the same) as when I feel like I am bracing myself for a verbal assault (again, that manifests itself specifically in a lot of tension in back). I don't think I'm expecting to be attacked, but it definitely feels like my system is screaming at me to not talk about whatever it is.

This is also distinctly different to when I can't quite explain something or struggle to describe what I am feeling. In those cases I end up taking a minute to work out how to phrase what I am experiencing or describe the concept I am trying to explain (and I almost always have to break eye contact to do this).

Does anyone else experience this sort of difficulty and how would you describe it?

Edited to add clarification (also in one of the comments):

I can talk about lots of things (not just special interests) including divisive issues such as politics (and sometimes even when I know I’m likely to receive an unpleasant response), but it’s difficult to neatly categorise what types of topics cause this. If I had to guess, it would be topics surrounding my (emotional?) needs that are most likely to trigger this. The current one (and this was a challenge to even type) is the fact that a combination of health+work+life factors is currently making me feel like I’m stuck with no good options to resolve them and hence going to miss out on a lot of things in life that I value.

It’s not necessarily dependent on who the other party/parties in the conversation is/are, either. For example, I have an incredibly non-judgemental and compassionate GP and yet one of these instances occurred when trying to work through my health issues this year. My wife is incredibly understanding and patient as well, so it’s not as though it’s an unsafe environment for the above conversation either.

9
 
 

I always knew I was different, but it was only at 33 that someone suggested I might have it (I was getting myself checked out after my father passed), so I talked to a doctor about it a couple of times but never truly did all the tests.

It took me having both kids diagnosed to go through the entire process to get my diagnosis (same as the kids, unsurprisingly), and I cannot avoid cursing myself at 33 for not doing it sooner. Everything I learned in the 10+ years between both things could have made that period a bit smoother, using all the tools and techniques I have acquired since.

10
 
 

Recent in this question is however you define it 🙂

11
 
 

What behaviors do you conduct when completely unmasked?

12
 
 

Ok, I had a preauricular sinus, which I have had removed because of later complications (apparently is more common, but I can't find the specific data) and probably dyspraxia (of which diagnosis I won't seek, as I have already had enough trouble with the great Slovenian medical system (at least we have public health insurance)(as you can see, I also can't shut up if that's in the DSM)).

13
 
 

Think about all the "quirky" things you do when you think no one is perceiving you.

14
 
 

What words or phrases do you repeat repeatedly?

15
16
 
 

Cross-posting here from lemmy.world because I'm autistic and this might be an autistic thing. It think it would be helpful to hear how other autistic people make sense of this since we seem to think alike. Also, does any here have this same issue with being confused by the term?

inb4 "Baby, don't hurt me."

But for real...what do people mean when they say "I love you," or "Do you love them?" I'm really confused by this because love seems to have such a varying definition. People say love for all sorts of things, and it seems like everyone else understands which definition they're using in the moment. Here are some examples in which each one has a different meaning:

  • I love pancakes.
  • I love my mother.
  • I love my romantic partner.
  • I love my best friend.
  • I love my career.
  • I love going to the beach.
  • My dog loves me.
  • That couple is in love.
  • Where is the love?

Background: I recently saw an episode of a show (spoiler below) where there was an adolescent heterosexual couple. The girl had a female best friend that she kissed, and is now confused about what she wants. She told her boyfriend about it. The boyfriend then asked her, "Do you love her?" What is he asking? If love means attachment and care, then clearly she does because that's her best friend. However, since that is so clear, he's not asking that. What is he asking??

Another specification is when people ask "Do you love them, or are you in love with them?"

I am confused by this term and the whole concept in general. I think I could really use some clarification, examples, or how to know which definition someone is going with when they use it.

Name of showThe show is Atypical on Netflix.

17
 
 

Anime is pretty popular among autistic people. However, aside from being obsessed with Voltron as a kid, I never got into it. I'm wondering what I'm missing.

18