this post was submitted on 31 Jul 2024
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Source: Bad Wonton

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[–] lvxferre@mander.xyz 16 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (6 children)

so what do we [you] do when we're [you're] upset?

Does anyone else here hate this specific usage of "we", forcedly including one speech participant when referring to the other?

[–] MacNCheezus 20 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I think it's fine in this context because presumably, the therapist and the client are on the same team, but I do dislike it in another situations where consent isn't necessarily as strongly implied.

[–] sundray@lemmus.org 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Agreed -- one of the techniques in therapy is for the therapist to model positive behavior or perspectives for the patient, rather than simply dictating to the patient what they should or shouldn't do: "We" are working together to find coping skills that will reduce the distress "we" feel.

But outside of a safe therapeutic environment, that "we wouldn't want that" or "we don't do that sort of thing" can be super dismissive and demeaning -- like how a parent would speak to a child.

[–] MacNCheezus 4 points 3 months ago

Yes, that's precisely what I meant. Thanks for fleshing it out.

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