this post was submitted on 02 Aug 2024
90 points (97.9% liked)

The Internet in Ancient Times

768 readers
225 users here now

Welcome to the stone age... or the bronze age... or the iron age... heck, anything with an 'age' is welcome, except our modern age or any ages to come.

This is about what the internet was like thousands of years ago back when it all started. Like when Darius the Great hired mercenaries via Craigslist or when Egypt invented emojis.

CODE OF LAWS

1 - Be civil. No name calling, no fighting, keep your flint hand axes inside your leather pouches at all times.

2 - Keep the AI stuff to a minimum. It gets annoying and old fashioned memes are more fun for everyone.

3 - None of this newfangled modern 21st century nonsense. We don't even know what "21st century" means.

4 - No porn/explicit content. The king is sensitive about these things.

5 - No lemmy.world TOS violations will be tolerated. So there.

6 - There is no ~~rule~~ law 6.

Laws of justice which Hammurabi, the wise king, established. A righteous law, and pious statute did he teach the land. Hammurabi, the protecting king am I. I have not withdrawn myself from the men, whom Bel gave to me, the rule over whom Marduk gave to me, I was not negligent, but I made them a peaceful abiding-place. I expounded all great difficulties, I made the light shine upon them. With the mighty weapons which Zamama and Ishtar entrusted to me, with the keen vision with which Ea endowed me, with the wisdom that Marduk gave me, I have uprooted the enemy above and below (in north and south), subdued the earth, brought prosperity to the land, guaranteed security to the inhabitants in their homes; a disturber was not permitted. The great gods have called me, I am the salvation-bearing shepherd, whose staff is straight, the good shadow that is spread over my city; on my breast I cherish the inhabitants of the land of Sumer and Akkad; in my shelter I have let them repose in peace; in my deep wisdom have I enclosed them. That the strong might not injure the weak, in order to protect the widows and orphans, I have in Babylon the city where Anu and Bel raise high their head, in E-Sagil, the Temple, whose foundations stand firm as heaven and earth, in order to bespeak justice in the land, to settle all disputes, and heal all injuries, set up these my precious words, written upon my memorial stone, before the image of me, as king of righteousness.

founded 2 months ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de -1 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Thing hosts and/or attendies might ever bother to complain about? There are reasons solo women are welcomed to most venues, particularly sex clubs and orgies, but men must bring a date.

I've heard that gay orgies can have a shortage of tops, but there you can generally take turns. So yeah, "the problem" is not the shortage of cocks, and "problem" in this context is relative, like "first world problems" or "white people problems"...

... happy?

[–] Jake_Farm@sopuli.xyz 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

White people problems? Are you implying black orgies don't have these issues?

[–] MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Sure, let's go with that. Shoulda said "Priveleged Problems".

[–] Jake_Farm@sopuli.xyz 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Do only the privileged engage in orgies or are orgies inherently a privilege?

[–] MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 1 month ago

Wrong person to ask.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I won't be happy until I get to do a five-person manpile. Now who's going to trade me for this ox?

[–] MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Where you at that that's an even slightly difficult ask? If such were my goal, I could make it happen just by asking customers in a single shift at my day-job. I would end up job-less, but thoroughly used, promise.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

All jobs are day jobs. Do you expect people to plow fields by tallow light?!

[–] MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Strangely, I could probably get five dudes together for that just as easilly. Lotsa masochists and gullible schmucks around here.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yeah, but then you need to have someone watch the ox so it doesn't get away during the orgy.

[–] MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The ox was traded for four+ dudes plowing the field by tallow light.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Plowing will definitely be going on.