this post was submitted on 19 Aug 2023
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Asklemmy

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[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 21 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Then why speak of it?

I don’t talk about previous sexual partners with new ones.

[–] Driftking@lemmy.ml 34 points 11 months ago (4 children)

For the purpose of disclosure. I just cant live with myself if I do not tell prospective partners when they ask. I know there is a difference between avoidance and lying, however, I value honesty. Not implying that you are not or should thinknas I do

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 56 points 11 months ago (4 children)

Last year I shit myself while trying to open my door and get to the bathroom.

I dropped my keys while I was trying to unlock the door and ended up with shit in my shoes that I had to throw away.

I never bring that up on dates.

[–] Bluehood380@lemmy.world 32 points 11 months ago (1 children)

This story made my panties wet.

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 23 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Hopefully it’s not shit.

[–] Guntrigger@feddit.ch 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

That's a surprising stance coming from SatansMaggotyCumFart

Okay, Gunt Rigger.

[–] 3ntranced@lemmy.world 7 points 11 months ago

That's a third date story

[–] Driftking@lemmy.ml 7 points 11 months ago

What an amecdote. Thank you for lightening my mind lol

[–] HellAwaits@lemm.ee 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I get your point, but I think that's a bit of a false equivalence. You don't tell others of stuff like this likely because it's embarrassing, but what if someone isn't embarrassed of using sex services? Is it really the same thing then?

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Why would I be embarrassed about that story?

I share it with my friends because it’s fucking hilarious.

[–] richieadler@lemmy.myserv.one -3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I hope I never meet you or your friends.

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Did this comment make your life any fuller or better in any way?

[–] richieadler@lemmy.myserv.one -1 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Does your existence do that for any other persons besides your accomplices?

Enjoy your existence, I’ll enjoy mine.

Have a nice day.

[–] ChrisLicht@lemm.ee 10 points 11 months ago (1 children)

You have an over-sharing problem.

[–] DrQuint@lemm.ee 6 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I can't agree. I think people should have a friendship as strong as their romance.

[–] ChrisLicht@lemm.ee 6 points 11 months ago

Some things are not made to be shared. You are two different people. Leave a little mystery.

I’ve been with my partner for 27 years, so have a bit of experience to draw from.

[–] TheActualDevil@sffa.community 4 points 11 months ago

Is it typical to give a whole run-down of your sexual history when dating? Like, I've mentioned previous encounters or exes when it comes up, but rarely near the beginning of the dating process. In my experience people tend to not have those discussions. Not because it's bad but because it doesn't matter. When I meet a new woman and start seeing them, I don't need to hear about or care about their past relationships unless it's something they feel they want to share for whatever reason.

It sounds like you don't think sex work is immoral, so I wouldn't bring it up unless it's something that would actually affect your current relationship. If sex is casual enough to commodify then it's not something that would be brought up when getting to know someone. Do you also give them a run-down of every meal you've ever bought at restaurants?

[–] jayemar@lemm.ee 3 points 11 months ago

The fact that you need to "disclose" this makes it sound like you yourself see an issue with it

[–] givesomefucks@lemmy.world 15 points 11 months ago (1 children)

OP's out there on first dates asking if they have a problem with him doing it...

I can't imagine women are bringing it up

[–] Driftking@lemmy.ml 11 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Not necessarily first dates. I just answer truthfully when the topic comes up. I don't want to have it be a problem further down the line

[–] givesomefucks@lemmy.world 14 points 11 months ago (3 children)

I just answer truthfully when the topic comes up

It's just really hard to believe a women asks if you've had sex with a sex worker...

Most people don't ask for numbers, let alone details.

[–] Driftking@lemmy.ml 12 points 11 months ago (1 children)

It has unfortunately come up before, hence my aprehension in approaching the topic.

[–] melisdrawing@lemmy.world 11 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Seems like you got the intended consequence. If you want to be honest and your partner can't handle that honesty, maybe it is better to keep looking. I have a very hard time maintaining lies to continue relationships, and as a result I have very few, but incredibly high-quality friends.

[–] SpaceCadet@sopuli.xyz 6 points 11 months ago (1 children)

It’s just really hard to believe a women asks if you’ve had sex with a sex worker…

I've been asked that question, and not just one time, so I believe OP that it can sometimes come up.

[–] givesomefucks@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Maybe because I've never lived somewhere it's legal?

Like if there were brothels in the area, maybe it would be asked more?

[–] SpaceCadet@sopuli.xyz 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Perhaps. It's a legal grey area here, not strictly legal but tolerated in certain areas (red light districts), but it's certainly not a socially acceptable thing.

[–] ParsnipWitch@feddit.de 2 points 11 months ago

I ask my partners because I do not want to be with someone who pays for sex. Simply because our views on sex would be very different which leads to problems in the relationship, from my experience. Also, it would be quite dumb to lie on this because than we are both just wasting our time.