this post was submitted on 25 Sep 2024
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Once when my sister and I were teenagers, she was hogging the computer and so I just picked up the chair with her in it to move her out of my way. As I walked past, her friend (whom I hadn't touched) used her bite to make an attack of opportunity against me. It wasn't gentle - there was no blood but there were tooth-marks.
I had mixed feelings afterwards. On the one hand, it hurt. On the other hand, a girl touched me. With her mouth. I had never been kissed at that point but being bitten was close...
(I didn't end up marrying her.)
Also a d6 bite is nonsense. The average commoner has 4 hp and 10 strength, so one commoner would be able to kill another commoner with a single bite 50% of the time. I'm not saying a human bite can't be lethal, but it's not "stabbed with a shortsword" lethal. Meanwhile, even a d4 bite from a level 1, 16-str barbarian is already invariably lethal to a commoner.
(Yeah, I know, HP isn't supposed to be realistic, etc. I just hate fun.)
I love this post and not just because I appreciate realism in gaming.
When I was in second grade a girl I barely knew and a boy I only slightly knew more were wrestling. I thought he was about to lose the upper hand so I intervened and the girl and I wound up rolling down a small hill, I don’t recall if that was part of my attack plan but let’s just say it was.
Now at the bottom of the hill she wound up with the high ground and while I lay on my back with my stomach exposed. She took this opportunity to bite me and while similarly it didn’t break skin I was still taken to the hospital for shots. Cassie, I still think about you sometimes.
Why did you delete this @absentbird@lemm.ee ? It was hilarious.
Haha, I'm glad you liked it. I was a little bit drunk and worried it might not be as funny to everyone else as it seemed in my head at the time.