Compelling point. I just found that arguing with „these kind of people“ (livibg in europe, so no MAGA‘s here but like-minded, conservative fundamentalists etc.) leads to nowhere. It‘s kind of like the covid-conversations. And often I heard „you can‘t make them change their minds, so just let them be“. Still, I think this behaviour leads to isolation and separates us as a people even more.

Long story short: good question. If you found the answer, let me know.

[–] Vlado@feddit.org 1 points 7 hours ago

I can only speak from my very limited experience. My father is the very example of a person who has some beliefs and tries to judge whole world through those beliefs. Everyone who doesn’t share those beliefs is an enemy. If you don’t believe in extreme opinion A, you automatically have to believe in extreme opinion B which is the opposite of A. You probably know such people.

Over last years, we yelled at each other lots of times, but that lead to nowhere. What actually helped was that finding the common ground. To make him understand that just because I don’t agree with his side, it doesn’t necessarily mean that I’m shilling for the other one. Not everything is bipolar. From my father’s perspective, everyone has to be either pro-Russian or pro-American (which is funny from today’s perspective, but I guess you get my point). You point out that Russia did something bad? He will tell you “Yeah and USA did ! You don’t have an issue with that”. And that’s the thing. To make him understand, that I DO have an issue with that. World is not a football match where you have to take a side and fully commit to it. You don’t have to go “full in” on a topic. Your opinion can be nuanced based on the actual topic, not just dumbed down into “my side thinks that A, so I agree with A. Your side thinks that B, so you have to agree with B”.

Before that I never had much success in having a proper discussion. It always ended up in a screaming match, because he wasn’t listening to arguments. He simply knew, that I had the “other” opinion, so my opinion was automatically wrong. Now he knows, that I don’t fully agree with anyone. He now somehow understands that my opinions are based on a set of principles, not on a tribalistic “my team” vs “your team”. And by understanding that, he’s more open to actually having a discussion on a topic, not just trying to convert me from “bad side” to “good side”.

And don’t get me wrong. He still believes in what he believes in. But he’s more open to accepting that not everything “his side” says is automatically correct. And that by itself is a small victory for me.