this post was submitted on 06 Jul 2023
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Autism

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High functioning autistic eight year-old daughter asking for your guys advice. (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 year ago by RoseyCat@lemmy.world to c/autism@lemmy.world
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Hello all, my daughter is eight years old. She is high functioning autistic. One trouble she has is she will either misunderstand social situation’s or become easily triggered. When these things happen her mind becomes disorganized and she will have meltdowns. She will not be able to gather her thoughts and ends up yelling at the other person (usually her older brother) but not in a way that is not productive to solving the problem..

I have talked to her about calm down techniques, but she is asking if there is ways that people with autism specifically handle these things. I know how I handle them, but I am coming from neurotypical perspective and even though I have done a lot of reading on this topic I feel it would be a good idea to reach out to the community to see if you all have any advice for her.

So what do you all do in a high stress situation where your brain just wants to yell? What helps sooth and calm, sooth, and organize thoughts?

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[–] Binette@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I also sometimes get overstimulated. I'm not sure if what I do to calm down is the right thing to do, but I usually excuse myself and try to find a quiet remote place with not many people in (or best case scenario, nobody).

These places are usually my room, toilets, the school's psychiatrists room or other rooms like that, etc.

I just stay there until I feel better and calm down. I'm not sure yet if people consider someone asking to leave in the middle of something rude or if they would understand.

[–] DaSaw@midwest.social 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I second this. It's what works for me, as well, and I learned it from my dad, who has the same problem.

But you're right: some people do consider it "rude" to do this. That said, it's still preferable to melting down all over someone's face, and people like that are pretty much lost causes, for people like us.

That said, for people who are willing to make reasonable accomodations (and in the workplace, that's a legal term) if we've already explained we need to do this from time to time beforehand, people can be pretty accepting. It only takes a little while, so long as you don't have anxiety about the departure piled on top of whatever else is going on.

[–] RoseyCat@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

I wouldn’t consider it rude at all especially if someone politely excuses themself. It’s quite considerate to yourself and others actually.