doomer

Sorry If this is a bit of a post where I mope because my life is honestly not that great now. It's more of a vent.

I feel like every since the 2020s started my life kind of went to shit. Most likely because I'm growing up (about to enter my early 20s in a couple of months and am Gen Z). 2024 was sorta ok then again It was way worse for some since I'm not from what's considered " The West™ ". I'm a Balkan dude lol.

A lot of stuff has kind of piled up over the last couple of months. From the student blockades here (I'm in college) to my family's problems sorta culminating to a very shit thing yesterday which I won't get into much because privacy. I just can't help but be upset over the present and scared what the future will bring.

Most of my teen years I felt pretty lonely. I don't know how but I feel like I unlearned how to socialize. By that I mean It takes time for me to warm up and start talking to people. I suck at group convos too lol. I am making an effort to socialize more thankfully. Hell today I made some anti-Stormfront action and touched grass with a friend. Not that my pre-2020 social life was any better, was kind of a punching bag but I still had friends and didn't feel lonely and bored. Also I struggle getting some social cues or jokes for some reason. Idk why.

Not to mention job hunting and trying to find my own place. Job hunting I think for the most part of the world is kinda shit rn. Also renting, let alone buying, an apartment here is expensive. Landlords really upped their prices since 2022 because a lot of EU countries, from what I've heard, wouldn't let Russian immigrants in so a lot of them came here. It's kind of impossible for a minimum wage job to rent really. So yeah fuck landlords. Doesn't help I'm the creative type (graphic design, 2d animation, illustrations) which doesn't help my case with AI shit on the rise. I do know some programming like C and Python but I don't feel competent enough.

I won't comment much further because I'm already yapping too much. But I feel like over the last few months or so the blockades went into a direction I don't like. General strikes were a failure but I saw that students are cooking up something with some bigger unions see so we'll see what comes from that. But the whole pacifist, pro-EU narrative turned me off really. Kind of why I haven't really went to a protest in 2 months now. I'm in a org but I feel like we could be doing way more. Which I will ask my comrades about so we'll still see. We kind of distanced ourselves because we don't really see the protests going anywhere.

These days I kinda reminisce about the period of 2012-2019 sometimes. I feel stuck and that's about It really. Just wanted to vent and ask sorta. Thanks for reading 'case you do.