Canada

Coming from a trans person in Oregon who got my passport changed last year out of paranoia, I wonder if you're overreacting. I think Oregon and other states like Washington, California, and northeastern states are friendly to lgbt folk, and it will be a hard fight if Trump wants to stop us from having rights. Portland is a metro area friendly to lgbt, and if you have no income, you can get on the Oregon health plan for free healthcare. I'm worried about you saying that you don't want to get on meds because you are afraid of the withdrawals. Of course you should make the decision you think is best, but isn't it better to have good mental health now rather than have bad MH in the hopes of avoiding your fear sometime in the future? Take care of yourself, remember that there is no certainty in life, there are risks in exposing yourself as mentally unhealthy, but there are also risks in not getting the help you need.