Selfhosted
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Same.
I will say that there are some troubling statements here:
I don't know what's going on, but it sounds like a real mess. I hope OP is able to recover from this, and I hope whatever negative elements that exist in the relevant communities are dealt with.
So yeah, it definitely seems like there's more to it, and I don't even know if the OP is "good" or "bad" here.