When I was a kid, I was punished excessively. My diagnosis occurred when I was 25. In the 1980s, I got paddled every day at school and was punished constantly. It made me feel rejected, leading to rejection sensitivity dysphoria. By the time I was 9, I decided life was not worth living and have not changed my mind at 45 years old. I would never have a child to suffer the way I did. I still feel like nobody wants me around. My mental health issues have severely impacted my quality of life. I'm just now figuring out that this might be why I have never felt my clock tick, or thought for even a second of my life that I wanted kids.
Has this happened to anyone else? I wonder how many in this forum might have decided against parenthood due to ADHD effects without realizing it.
Update:
Here are the results as of June 12, 2025 ( or at least I think I counted decently):
- 7 people do not want kids
- 9 said they have and/or want kids
- 3 responses did not conclude one way or another
Hope this was helpful, even with small sample sizes. This seems to be close to current statistics. Out of 16 who responded definitively, 7 did not want kids, which is 44%, compared to 47% shown in the statistics. This concludes that no evidence has been found from this post to suggest that ADHD has a significant impact on parenting desires. Further research could better validate the results.
And the share of U.S. adults younger than 50 without children who say they are unlikely to ever have kids rose 10 percentage points between 2018 and 2023 (from 37% to 47%), according to a Pew Research Center survey
You might have CPTSD in addition to ADHD
I've thought about that, but the definitions online seem to only include serious traumas that I have not been through.
complex trauma is due to many smaller events occurring over a long period of time, usually during childhood but also during a relationship. "serious" traumas are not necessary