I don't know you or your friends, but I do know that everybody goes through their own shit. You shouldn't look at it as a reflection on you. Maybe at some point you can reach out to some of them or they'll surprise you and do the same. I'm of the opinion that true friends i.e., the ones who've stuck through it with you no matter what in the past, where those bonds were formed early, are pretty permanently going to be there in the future when you call on them or need them. Give it some time and don't be hard on yourself. As someone who probably has ADHD, that and other mental illnesses drain people's ability to maintain relationships down, unless they're in close proximity or a spouse, and even then it is hard.. I'm supposed to get up and call the bank to sort a problem for my wife and I and I just wanna lay in bed and dick off because I'm tired. Life is tiring man..

I feel you.

On your 3rd paragraph, I also have no idea why this happens, but we are not the only ones. Maybe people get the idea we became too self-centered?

I cannot comment on you because I don't know you, but in my case, if I were to be self-critic, I always focus too much on my career, wife, hobbies, household chores, family... friends were always the last priority on my schedule. People pick up on that quickly, idk.

I do have some friends though who are low maintenance and with these I find its much easier to keep friends with. We can go 6 months without seeing each other and its still fun to get together.