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Why do i "fear" nostalgic,old,familiar things? (lemmy.ml)

submitted 2 years ago by Illyria@lemmy.ml to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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[–] tias@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I've been wondering the same for a long time. For example I almost never listen to music from when I was younger.

Sure it could be trauma like some have suggested in this thread, but I'm pretty sure that's not the case with me. For one thing I can't say my childhood was traumatic, and besides I feel the same thing for any given time period in my life (I'm over 40 years old).

I think it's because:

It's a strong feeling. Even if it's a positive feeling, it can be difficult to deal with if it's too intense.
It makes you realize how many other pathways your life could have taken. Every choice you've made since has limited the options you have for the future. What if you made the wrong choice? What have you missed? Could you have been happier in an alternate universe? You're closer to death now than you were then. Time is running out.

Mindfulness meditation has helped me deal with it. It helps me explore feelings, good or bad, with interest (but detachment) instead of being consumed by anxiety. It has helped me internalize that I can always begin again. I'm not tied down by previous choices. Every day is full of opportunities.