I just want to vent a bit - I started seeing someone a few weeks ago. Old fling that I ran into through some friends that got rekindled, and I was excited that it seemed like more than just casual hookups this time. But there were some yellow flags I ignored that turned out to be red flags, and now I'm feeling frustrated and hurt.

Dude for real dropped the line that men are more "capable" and "logical" on me. That gender studies are "indoctrination." I told him we should probably stop seeing each other if that's really what he thinks. It wouldn't be logical for me to keep seeing someone that thinks lesser of me, now, would it?

I'm grateful to have some guy friends that I turned to after I left, cuz I wanted to go into "fuck all men" mode, but I know it's not true or helpful. Just like there are women out there that have internalized misogyny, there's feminist men, enbies, etc. We're all just people and we're not monoliths beholden to differences in biology. This is just sexist, manosphere bullshit in particular

Anyway. I'm still feeling angry and wanted to put it out there for some support and solidarity. Anyone have a recent win they'd like to share or something?

ETA: Thank you so much for the conversation y'all! I've been trying to keep up but I gotta get some sleep. I'll check in later but hope everyone has a good day. Keep up the empowerment! 💜

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[–] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 5 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Many feminist theorists pose that most/all forms of oppression (racism, homophobia, transphobia, classism, etc.) are modeled after misogyny

Could you possibly give a brief synopsis of why they think misogyny is the base model rather than (eg) racism? Considering many countries afford rights to different races before women (eg black men could vote in the US before women) it does make sense, but I'm curious about the basic theory.

[–] S_204@lemm.ee 6 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Patriarchal society developed before the concepts of race we use today. Much of how society was shaped stemmed from the tribes and clans of the pre modern era.

[–] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 0 points 11 months ago

How pre modern are we talking? Because it seems like homo sapiens vs neanderthal would've had more cross cultural discrimination than men and women within the same species.

[–] WldFyre@lemm.ee 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Because cultures made up exclusively of one race were still misogynistic. And because there's actual physical differences between the sexes that are used to wrongly justify discriminating against women.

[–] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 1 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

A monoculture being misogynistic doesn't really show that the base model is misogyny. It seems like you'd have to have a culture with mixed races early on that discriminated against women before other races to decisively prove the point.

[–] WldFyre@lemm.ee 2 points 11 months ago

It seems like you'd have to have a culture with mixed races early on that discriminated against women before other races to decisively prove the point.

Your previous comment:

Considering many countries afford rights to different races before women (eg black men could vote in the US before women) it does make sense

I assumed you understood your own point that you made, so I'm not sure what you're asking for now.

[–] BarrelAgedBoredom@lemm.ee 2 points 11 months ago

Others have already answered your question but I thought I'd leave you with an article about it in case you want more information. There's a lot more to be said on this than a few comments and the odd article but it's a good enough place to start