this post was submitted on 09 Dec 2023
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Transfem

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[TW: Hate] How have you dealt with real life experiences of hate and transphobia? (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by Amelia_@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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Recently I have been struggling a little trying to accept and prepare for the consequences of coming out and exposing this very sensitive part of myself to the world. With the increase in hate crimes and anti-trans sentiment it is a very scary idea.

This was made even worse by a comment I found on Reddit today:

People ask why I bailed on transitioning. It’s not fun having your entire right to exist as a human being used as a political tool. It’s exhausting. I don’t want to have to spend my life justifying who I am to people who frankly don’t give a shit either way. They just want to hate me. 15 years ago nobody gave a toss which toilet I used in public. Today I’ll get spat on while waiting for a bus because I dared wear a dress. Not once in my life in this country till about 5 or 6 year ago did I ever feel scared for my safety for being who I am. I may be miserable now, but at least nobody is spitting on me anymore.

So I'd love to hear other's perspectives on what they've actually experienced and how they have dealt with it. I am sorry for raising such a painful topic but hopefully it can help people.

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[–] mjsaber@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 1 year ago

Support is important. Being trans means being a minority, and that means being exposed to minority stress. There's a significant segment of the population that hates us (not because they really do, but because they've been conditioned to).

Being trans, especially during the transition period, is fucking hard,and it's about 10x worse when Fox News is shoveling hate as fast and far as they can.

I've had a lot of really negative experiences since transitioning, especially in the workplace. But I've also found some of the most meaningful relationships and a career that feels like I've found my purpose.

There's lots of good and lots of bad, and that's why support systems are . If you're in an area that is hostile with no support, you might want to look at non-social forms of affirmation. If you're in a supportive or even neutral community with some kind of pereonal support system, then you have a real chance of living your best life.

If you're somewhere in between, I suggest weighing the risks and benefits and going from there.