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Agreed. I don't think there were any top tier phones, hardware wise, that have all the things people want in a cellphone: IR blaster, SD slot, headphone jack, high-end chipset , great screen and a big battery just doesn't exist. Probably added on there would be ease of installing custom OS as well but most would settle for a phone that didn't if it had all the previous.
All that said I think the Golden Lemmy should go to the biggest disappointment instead.
With the exception of the chipset, my Redmi Note 11 has those. I'm even running a nice Rom that let me escape the original garbage OS on it. I've heard Xiaomi will stop unlocking the devices, so I think my only other option will be Motorola in the future.
That appears to be 4g only, but it is affordable, so I guess I should have considered it.
There's a 5G version as well
These aren't necessarily top end phones, but not bad once you get a new ROM for it.
I didn't know IR blasters in phones were ever common. There are a few phones (Unihertz at least) these days that have them. The Moto G Stylus 5G (I just got one) has everything else you mentioned. Missing are swappable batteries and wireless charging.