this post was submitted on 14 Jan 2024
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Hiya ladies,

Today I'm trying to understand how to let go of the mean, unhappy boy I never wanted to be, and embrace the passionate, loving girlie I dream of becoming.

Before I was brave enough to accept myself I was self-isolating, over eating, and indulging in various other coping mechanisms for short term, unsustainable dopamine hits. I was also mean, anti-social, and very standoffish because I thought that's who people expected me to be.

Now I want to be, need to be, someone completely different, letting out the parts of myself that I suppressed for so long I forgot they were even there. How did you do it? How did you unlearn those almost instinctive behaviours and defence mechanisms that keep people away and keep your real self buried and suffocating?

Thank you in advance <3

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[–] Lumelore@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 10 months ago

You will always need coping mechanisms. Even when life is going well you can still have bad days. What I did was to find healthy coping mechanisms to use to replace the bad ones. There are many ways to cope and not all the ways work for everyone, so just try them out and see what works. One that I started using very early on was relaxation breathing and another that I started more recently is exercising.