askchapo

Masking is a kind catch-all term for acting like a neurotypical person in social situations, in order to avoid social conflicts and misunderstandings. It's exhausting. Imagine being an actor doing a live stage play all day without a break. After a long day at work pretending to be neurotypical to fit in, we need to go home and just shut out the world and recharge in safe solitude. There's no energy left to do anything else. It's not about trying to deceive neurotypical people with malicious intent. It's just self-defence.

Autistic kids who aren't on the severe end of the spectrum tend to subconsciously learn masking at a very early age. After decades of doing this every single day we often have no idea who we really are anymore. That's why "unmasking" is so important for our mental health, even at the cost of one's social standing or career prospects. We're literally tired of literally acting. We just want to figure out who we really are, to be ourselves, to have society accept that, and for acquaintances and relatives and employers to make a few simple accommodations (like not springing unexpected short-notice same-day social event invitations on us) that would make our lives much less stressful.