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Heyuh, any hot tips on how I can get the hell out of this abuse house? BioParents have decided that one "no" is far too many and they've decided to try to break into my room. They're yelling a bunch of bullshit and telling me to get out but also they're trying to work out how to break into my room?!

I'm in rural northeastern Oklahoma; I've got a bit of money (assuming they don't rob me of that somehow) but no real means of supporting myself because I'm autistic and agoraphobic in the middle of nowhere, relying on them for everything. I've finally got just a little bit of help (some medications at least, nothing fancy) and it's just too little too late I guess.

tl;dr: BioParents threatening, bullying me. Need some kind of lasting escape, need help creating my own life if such thing is possible. Need to never be here again.

Edit: Sorry, I'm a bit scattered. Sorry if this is the wrong place for this. Couldn't find anywhere that is. Also I may lose "their" Internet connection because cutting me off from help is totally not abusing me but actually a reasonable way for them to "take back their property" (they want all of my keys as part of throwing me out, I've never been able to deal with confrontation and they know it... blah blah BS). May be able to use my phone... ugh.

Edit 2: They called the cops on me.
Edit 3: The guy with the Punisher tat explained that no one had done anything wrong but they can't throw me out without going through the eviction process. BioMom has been through that process before (she used to run an apartment complex!) so she damn well knew she couldn't do that, and that the cops wouldn't help her unless they were just hardcore transphobes who'd just as soon shoot me. No shock to me, the only logical reason she called them was to bully me harder or just get me killed.
Edit 4: Night now, managed a kitchen+toilet trip. Didn't get thrown directly into jail nor "institutionalized" for daring to disobey my dear sweet loving and supportive (sarcasm) mother and her imaginary right to invade every detail of my life. Still don't know where to go. I'm too old for many things, too young for others. Kinda afraid (ashamed?) to even try to contact any kind of shelter because like... they've got a handful of rooms and I'm gonna ask for one because I'm a thirty-something loser who's broken and getting thrown out? They made me broken and they're throwing me out for trying to keep one single detail of my life from her but... damn, is that really fair to ask, when others have been through so much worse? Besides, probably nowhere has any space available, so I'll just be stressing over a phone call or whatever and get nothing from it but more stress. FML, wish I'd been born to an actually decent family or not at all. (Edit 4b: No-go on the whole family/friends thing.)
Edit 5: Still alive! Feels like none of this is even real, like I must've just dreamed it all. I think it's this room messing with my head, like nothing can ever change. Am just yapping I guess 🤷 (Edit 5b: Oh, edits count as bumps. Sorry >.<; )
Edit 6: Now BioMom's lashing out at BioDad too. Apparently she's going to take us to hell with her when/after(?) she dies. What the actual fuck. Anyway, in case he comes and kills me I'd like to mention that the new name I've been flirting with is Keris. Nocritter asked and I'm in no state to be soul-searching right now but I kinda want to say it, I guess. Might as well try to be as me as I can when I don't know if there's gonna be a me in ten minutes. On the plus side, if she decides to still go to her thing on Monday I'll have a window for escape. Just have to figure out how, and where to go.
Edit 6b: Okay, not dead yet. No idea what's going on out there; haven't heard anything in a while. Realized I may sound a little insane being afraid of BioDad when BioMom is the one screaming about taking people to Hell with her. She's very movement impaired and can't get to my end of the house on her own. Sad, yes. Complicated. He, on the other paw, is as cruel as she lets him get by with. He's always been physically intimidating (though not yet "violent"), verbally abusive, always looking to do as much damage as he can without her scolding him for it. So if she's not a factor... he's a threat.
Edit/Update 7: They taped a seven-day eviction notice to my door. Looks like state law requires thirty but Idunno if I can last that long anyway, given I'm afraid to even cross the lil hallway to get to the toilet. I'm very not okay, I need somewhere safe to go, at least long enough to calm down and figure out what the hell to do but there's just nothing for it. Might be able to afford a hotel for a couple weeks if I don't eat. I'm not eating anyway so maybe that's not so bad. No friends, no family, no space in shelters (and I don't meet anyone's criteria anyway), no place to go if I do manage to leave, no idea where else to even try or ask. Hell, I'm almost out of bottled water too. If any brave adventurers wanna swoop in and rescue me, now's the time :-\

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[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 year ago (25 children)

I did some research.

You mentioned that you live in northeastern Oklahoma, so I'm assuming you're in a somewhat reasonable distance from Tulsa. It is possible that you could get an Uber to go from Tulsa to where you are rurally (for a pretty penny, of course). If I were you, I'd play around with the app and see if you can get anything. If not, try another service such as Lyft or a local taxi service based out of Tulsa. Here's a list of some: https://m.yelp.com/search?cflt=taxis&find_loc=Tulsa%2C+OK You can try calling the local ones and explain that you need a ride to Tulsa from where you are and that you are happy to pay or whatever.

Once you get to Tulsa, there is a Greyhound bus station there. The address is 317 S Detroit Ave, Tulsa, OK 74120. You can get pretty much anywhere you need to go once you get to the station. Make sure to buy your ticket in advance. They have routes to pretty much every major US city. You will need to dress conservatively so as to not be visibly trans. I know that it's painful but when travelling on things like Greyhound it's safety first. From what I've heard, Greyhound can be pretty janky and have some weird people, but it will get you to where you need to go since you don't have a car. Just keep a watchful eye on all of your belongings and surroundings.

Make sure other people know about your whereabouts as you travel in case anything were to happen. It can be an online friend, this community, or anything else. Have a plan with them about what to do if anything goes wrong. It is always best to be prepared, even though the chance of anything nefarious happening is very low.

When you get to the state that you're going to, look into the government programs. Blue states are a lot more generous with them than most red. You can qualify for disability because you have autism, so look into that. You might also be able to get things like unemployment, food stamps, and other government assistance while you're trying to figure things out.

Also, please try to eat. It's very important to keep your strength up in situations like these and not eating will make you weaker and your brain foggier. Even if you're not hungry, just try to get something down.

I hope this helps. I'm really really praying that you get out of the situation you're in safely and get to a better place. I promise you, you can have a much better life than the one you've been living. There are places where you can be yourself freely. There are people who will accept you for who you are. It's not going to be easy, but I can promise you that it's going to be worth it.

[–] RiikkaTheIcePrincess@pawb.social 2 points 1 year ago (24 children)

Thanks <3 Eep, though. 14-25hr bus trip scary. Dunno if I can even pass as cis male now. Chest-bumps already, no boy-clothes but some old suits (great way to 'lose track of some belongings,' I'd think). May just go anyway... secretly hoped to fly but a cheap bus ticket to Minneapolis (just picked a place, still dunno where to go) is $100 (which is kinda suspicious since others are like $180, $250, $350??) while air fare is $400 :-\ Boo. Shaking like a leaf just looking. Ugh.

[–] cowboycrustation@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

You will definitely save money with a bus ticket, but air travel is less stressful and shorter. It's up to you as to which you wanna choose. You'll get to the same place regardless.

Maybe try wearing some loose clothing to hide the chest bumps? A full suit would make you stand out too much. It's just when you're traveling in a region like Oklahoma. You won't have to do that in minneapoils.

Have you figured out where you're gonna stay when you arrive? After you determine your travel arrangements, you'll need to reserve something like a hotel or airbnb for when you arrive. Also, PACK SNACKS. You're gonna get hungry while you're traveling and there are not always places to get food. Airport and plane food is also considerably more expensive than from outside. Make triple sure you bring water and a reusable water bottle, too.

Things are gonna be okay. You're making a huge leap right now and that's something to be proud of. It takes a lot of courage to be doing this. Remember to breathe in and out.

breathes left then down, getting the directions completely wrong 😵‍💫 I don't even know where to go yet v.v Guess I need to make that post and find somecritter to hold my paw. Just make them pick and follow them around like a lost puppy 😅

Also, most of my clothes don't even fit any more. Turns out depressyness is as great for gaining weight as it is for losing weight. Also I think my shoulders and hips grew out just to upset me.

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