this post was submitted on 28 Mar 2024
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I love how many dicks have been drawn in historical artifacts by the people who built them. I remember reading about an engraving at the very top of an old column which the building was too unstable to get close enough to see for a long time. I think when they got up there and translated it it said something like "this is very high". It's nice to know people have always been people.
Maeshowe, in the Orkney Islands off the northern tip of Scotland. It's a properly ancient structure, and there are 30 runic inscriptions in it which are all just straight up graffiti, including "Tholfir Kolbeinsson carved these runes high up". My favourite part is it's not even that high up, like the guy was probably just on someone's shoulders.
Oddly enough we probably have the story of the graffiti artists. The Orkneyinga saga tells the tale of some 12th century Norsemen who took shelter there during a snowstorm and looted the place. By the time they did so, Maeshowe was already about 4,000 years old, and whatever they looted was probably left there by their own ancestors a few centuries beforehand.
You should see what they draw in front of most houses in Bhutan. Very creative and colourful dicks with pubes and cum and everything...
https://tasteofbhutan.com/the-phallus-of-bhutan-and-its-unique-meaning/
And meanwhile, in Ireland:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sheela_na_gig
A lot of archaeological dicks are apotropaic - they ward off evil. Some are for fertility of course. Today I feel like it's often seen as a minorly transgressive act, drawing something 'rude'. It's so fascinating that we keep doing the same thing and just change what we say it means.
That's bollocks. Whoever claimed that people used to draw dicks to ward off evil was talking out of their ass to make a dick pic seem classier. They were just embarrassed that their submission in an archeological journal was so similar to what they carved into their desk in school, and I'm damn certain the school desk isn't protected from evil either.
I'm just waiting for the first dick cave painting to be found. Then I'll know we've always been this way and I'll be able to die happy
Here you go
https://www.donsmaps.com/phallusstoneage.html
D-did they use these�
I'm starting to think that the saying "anything is a dildo if you're brave enough..." predates 2008 by quite a bit...
There was a lot of it in Herculaneum and Pompeii.
I also feel this way about all of the historical remnants of how much ancient people loved their pets. There are still ancient roadside shrines throughout Europe to memorialize ancient people's pets. <3
I love in Pompeii you can follow the dicks on the cobbles to the brothel, brilliant advertising.