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I need to survive for 3 days without pooping, and eating as little as possible. I can pee, but not very often. It can't take up too much space. What food do I pack? (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by mizu6079@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

794 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Please don't ask why I need this.

It would be great if the food also made me sweat less.

It has to be something I can easily find.

EDITS FOR CLARIFICATION:

I am not planning on partaking in any illegal activities.
I do not condone the use of illegal substances and am not planning on smuggling anything anywhere.
I am not going on a hiking trip or mailing myself anywhere.
I will be staying in a tent (not a small one; a huge with with air conditioning and everything). I will be traveling for five days, returning to my current location on day 3 and traveling again on the last two days. I will not poop on the first three days (hopefully).
Clean toilets with all the expected facilities will be available to me. I am not going to poop for reasons that I wish to keep to myself.
If it gets bad, like really bad, like a-piece-of-poop-is-literally-halfway-out-my-ass bad, I will use the toilets.

Please stop asking because I am not telling anyone the reason.

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[–] nepatriots32@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I recommend eating a lot of cheese and absolutely NO fiber. Not sure if it will make you sweat less, but I'm pretty sure if I ate only cheese for 3 days, it wouldn't be too hard to wait till the end of it to poop. In fact, I may need some help at that point... maybe you should eat some fiber like a couple hours before you do plan on trying to poop, and also drink lots of water at that point, too. I personally find cheese very "helpful" in getting myself constipated, and fiber + water to be a great way to smoothen the pooping process.

[–] 6fn@kbin.social 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

To share the wisdom of Weird Al Yankovic on this topic:

This cheese 'round the clock
is getting me blocked

[–] nepatriots32@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

And if we can't trust Weird AL for advice, then who can we trust?