this post was submitted on 13 Jan 2025
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I have decided to write down the reasoning behind me not (yet) closing my Facebook account. Which I really want to do, but feel like I cannot (yet).

My background: software developer.

What I use Facebook for: to keep up to date with family and friends.

In other words: I do not need "outside" people to see my posts. Not everything has to be shared with everyone for me.

I have noticed a lot of people opening up bluesky accounts "because it is not meta", (which is a good thing, obviously).

The only issue is that the fediverse is a twitter (I refuse the name X) platform. Everything is public. On friendica, I can at least control who follows me, but I cannot determine who can see my posts.

So in my case, what happens is that some people might open a bsky/fediverse account, realize that everything is public and not use it again.

Why does the fediverse not have a privacy control to limit who can see and interact with your posts? While I do realize that with the Federation protocol everything is sort of public, this is the thing that keeps me from moving from fb to fediverse.

Edit: Holy crap guys, thank you for all the responses. The fediverse is aliiiive.

Too much to respond to, but:

1: yes i know fb is evil 2: as soon as the friend updates end, i stop scrolling. No desire to see all the stupid diy "tips". 3: yes it sounds lame to use it to keep updated, but there is quite some distance between me and my friends and family 4: even if mastodon has the ability to not make posts public, every node admin can access the database. And I think that goes for every Federated platform, diaspora included.

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I use it for fam and friends, special interest groups, and local events. It’s still a useful platform if you curate it well. It just takes effort. And Firefox plugins.

[–] MajorHavoc@programming.dev 3 points 1 day ago

I don't think there's anything in the Fediverse meant to support the family updates use case.

We use giant SMS text message threads for that.

For more privacy, we get everyone to use Signal or XMPP with OMEMO.

You should be closing your Facebook regardless of your desire to use an alternative...

If you want private messaging decentralized, there is Matrix. If you don't mind, there is Signal or Threema.

[–] doingthestuff@lemy.lol 2 points 1 day ago

I have FB for (by priority):

My job's business profile I have to help manage (for now).

Communication with extended family and a couple of friends from years ago I don't live near anymore.

Rarely, marketplace.

I hate messenger and have myself set on permanently unavailable. I wish I could keep my basic FB but completely disconnect from it.

I don't post anything on my personal page.

I've never had an Instagram or used it. I have an okay VR but have never even looked into meta. I have Steam.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

I hate Facebook. Haven't used it for years, but a bare-bones profile sits there because of VR. But now I had the shocking thought of trying it for dating, because the alternative is the shitfest that is the Match Group monopoly on personal relationships. Neither is terribly appealing. Sucks.

[–] d00phy@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

I keep using Facebook to keep up with family and friends I don’t see all the time. I also use marketplace. I maintain a group of family members where I post jpgs of raw family photo scans I host (moving the raws to Immich at the moment). Other than that I occasionally post a funny thing from Lemmy as a “still alive” post.

[–] Rentlar@lemmy.ca 1 points 1 day ago

I have still my FB account, messenger and whatsapp. I refuse to sign up for Instagram, which is a little awkward because so many in my generation use it...

I try to occasionally be connected but I do it through Beeper so that I don't need the battery-draining data-zucking apps on my phone, since it interacts via a Matrix bridge hosted for me.

Kinda sounds like you might like Mastodon then.

[–] kbal@fedia.io 1 points 1 day ago

Akkoma and probably others like Misskey I assume do have follower-only posts and they do get used by some people who like to communicate with a small group and otherwise keep things private.

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