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I am a singlish women who has a long term friends with benefits, but is looking for a more substantial relationship. The thing is my fwb is used to me interrupting sexy times to tell them what ever thought that just popped into my head. Thankfully they are spectrumy too. (Ok this usually only happens during foreplay) but I am curious is this a 'just me' thing or are there others and am I stuck being intimate with only other people on the spectrum?

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[-] 18107@aussie.zone 18 points 6 months ago

My partner and I will routinely "ruin the moment" with stupid jokes and off topic thoughts. It hasn't ruined our relationship yet.

You could theoretically just excersise more conscious control over what you say, but that often leads to exhaustion/burnout. It's so much better to find someone who understands you, and who you can relax and be yourself around.

[-] InquisitiveApathy@lemm.ee 4 points 6 months ago

My partner and I will routinely "ruin the moment" with stupid jokes and off topic thoughts. It hasn't ruined our relationship yet.

This is my experience as well. Weird things get said sometimes, but it rarely ever ruins the mood. Sometimes it can slow the momentum though, but it ends up being because we're laughing more than anything.

[-] itsathursday@lemmy.world 11 points 6 months ago

If you build a connection with someone that wants to share that experience with you I’d say they’d be totally into whatever you say at any time because they will get you, sexy times or not.

[-] Septimaeus@infosec.pub 10 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Not just you. That’s normal and fun, and I think few but the impatient would complain if it’s during foreplay.

[-] JimboDHimbo@lemmy.ca 5 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Edit: omg my apologies y'all, I didn't read the entire name of the community, I just saw ADHD and started commenting. That's my bad, ladies. I'll show myself out.

[-] wildwhitehorses@aussie.zone 3 points 6 months ago

Nah, tell us what you got :)

[-] RIPandTERROR@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 6 months ago

Blue chew? Same issue & want to know what that is

[-] VelvetStorm@lemmy.world 3 points 6 months ago

From a quick Google its boner pills you get online.

[-] LegionEris@feddit.nl 5 points 6 months ago

Interestingly, I almost never have this problem since getting my hormones right. Getting lost in (or attacked by!) sex less thoughts used to occasionally plague our bedroom. Now sex is so fucking enormous that it tends to eclipse everything. My body is louder and more talkative than it used to be.

[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 3 points 6 months ago

My brain usually turns off during sex so I'm very unlikely to say anything unless we are having a conversation while doing the deed (which is great IMO).

this post was submitted on 07 Dec 2023
24 points (100.0% liked)

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