this post was submitted on 02 Jan 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] MuhammadJesusGaySex@lemmy.world 28 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (2 children)

I have always liked sturdy women. You know a good hearty woman. I’m not a small person. I like a thicc woman.

With that being said. I was friends with benefits with a chick in high school. One night we were riding around and she offhandedly says that she needs to lose weight. I, jokingly said “Well, you could always smoke crack”. The laugh and then silence that followed would be very telling.

That night was the last I heard from her for about a year. I would call her occasionally and her mom would say she’s not here, or she’s gone with her cousin. Finally I give up and before I know it a year has gone by.

One day my phone rings and I answer it. It’s homegirl! I ask how she’s been and where she’s been. She says she’s been ok, and in rehab. Apparently her and her cousin had been smoking crack. She asked if I knew where to get her some crack. I never liked uppers. So, naturally I had no clue where to get her some crack.

She never said it was my joke suggestion that inspired her. But it’s too much of a coincidence. I’ve always carried a little guilt for that.

[–] DeLift@feddit.nl 31 points 8 months ago

No way she wasn't already doing crack or thinking about doing crack before you made that joke dude.

She is her own person with her own responsibilities. Unless you put that pipe in her hand it's not your fault.

[–] Tyfud@lemmy.world 13 points 8 months ago

Bro, that's not on you. You made a funny joke. It was a funny joke. It wasn't in poor taste or anything.

I seriously don't that was the cause for her, but if it was , then holy shit, not only did you dodge a giant bullet, but she's absolutely fucking stupid and in no way is her behavior on you.

[–] fossphi@lemm.ee 20 points 8 months ago (1 children)

It's good that Anon didn't watch Dexter then

[–] Clent@lemmy.world 1 points 8 months ago

Who says they haven't? Someone needs to check their air vents.

[–] MeDuViNoX@sh.itjust.works 16 points 8 months ago

Just study law when you'd normally be asleep and represent yourself, Anon.

[–] platypus_plumba@lemmy.world 10 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

Well, Aaron Paul keeps getting hotter the more he smokes. I think we have a case of false advertisement in our hands guys.

Any lawyers? Serious replies please.

[–] Pharmacokinetics@lemmy.world 6 points 8 months ago

Hi, Saul Goodman here, and I will fight for you!

[–] Sheeple@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago

Actually if you watch the show they make a huge effort to not just never tell/show you how meth was made, they actually deliberately get a few things wrong to ensure no one recreates meth

In other words, the show creators did their part to try and stop this