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Have you been injured? Call Gowron Law. (lemmy.world)

submitted 11 months ago by ozoned@lemmy.world to c/risa@startrek.website

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[–] charonn0@startrek.website 25 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

I was framed for assassinating a politician and sent to Rura Penthe. Gowron got me $5,000!

[–] RootBeerGuy@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

$5,000

Surely you mean 5000 slips gold-pressed latinum?

[–] charonn0@startrek.website 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

It's an extraordinary example of Hodgkin's Law of parallel planetary development that the Ferengi symbol for "bars of gold pressed latinum" is also the ancient Earth dollar sign.

[–] RootBeerGuy@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 11 months ago

Convenient!

[–] dejected_warp_core@startrek.website 3 points 11 months ago

sent to Rura Penthe

I have good news and bad news for you.

The good news is: Since you now live at Rura Penthe, Gowron Law can represent you for your new Mesothelioma suit.

[–] ArtVandelay@lemmy.world 20 points 11 months ago

If you have been wrongly executed, please call 1-800-555-GOWRON

[–] NakariLexfortaine@lemm.ee 15 points 11 months ago (1 children)

My ex filled the holodeck with Tribbles, leading to severe injuries of a sensitive nature by both holodeck malfunctions and the Tribbles.

An evil Lincoln was involved, though. Do I still have a case?

[–] dejected_warp_core@startrek.website 3 points 11 months ago

Do I still have a case?

We actually have a class action suit for that very thing. Let me DM you the details.

[–] shutz@lemmy.ca 13 points 11 months ago

Gowron was killed while he was still chancellor. They're just using his image for advertising purposes, but you'll never get to meet him, and he won't go to court with/for you.

Ch'Pok had a more modest practice, but he'll represent you personally.

[–] techno156@kbin.social 12 points 11 months ago

My father was once falsely accused of being a bak'targ. Calling Gowron Law helped restore honour to my house. 35/9 great service.

[–] dejected_warp_core@startrek.website 4 points 11 months ago

Transporter buffer imprisonment

This is a horrifying concept and you bet I would send a Klingon law team after someone for that.

Console explosion

Do they have experience/success with suing The Federation? I heard they recently added Borg parts to all their ships - seems reckless to me.