Maybe it’s just late, but this one-two punch of randomness and absurdity just got me good. Still giggling.
this post was submitted on 10 Sep 2023
1085 points (99.1% liked)
Memes
45662 readers
996 users here now
Rules:
- Be civil and nice.
- Try not to excessively repost, as a rule of thumb, wait at least 2 months to do it if you have to.
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
It's about to be 2pm here and I'm laughing hard so it's not just you and not just the late hour 🤣
I've been giggling at this since I saw this in the morning. I'm trying to fall asleep now and I'm still here
We’re a collaboration first company, and that’s why the “Bees in my desk!” policy works for us. Nothing brings us closer than the sudden release of bees at our corporate headquarters. Some of you will feel some resistance to the idea, but an anonymous poll overwhelmingly approved of it. We look forward to a sudden swarm at our next mandatory town hall meeting.
Important Policy Update: As part of our continued commitment to being an inclusive work environment, we've elected to expand our popular 'Bees in my desk!' policy to also include paper wasps, yellow jackets, and tarantula hawks! Please look forward to the roll-out of this new and improved policy starting on Monday!
Judge all you want, but the paper wasps and tarantula hawks are a real improvement.
Yellow jackets can fuck right off though.
Yeah, you have to try to get tarantula hawks to bother you (unless you're a tarantula), and paper wasps have a pretty small aggression radius.
After Thursday, all employees will be required measures the amount of honey(nectar) that is gathered by their desk hive.
Hwhat's this? An overabundance of bees in the workplace? My briefcase full of bees ought to put a stop to that!
Can confirm I’m more efficient when collaborating with others when the bees are released.
But resistance is fu...n? :-P
Hey there team members!
I hope you all had a wonderful Labor Day weekend. Now that you’re back in the office, I’m sure some you are picking up on the new “buzz” around town. I bet some of you can’t even “bee-lieve” it!
Yasss queen, using some of our pizza party budget, we’ve installed all natural honey dispensers into everybody’s desk! But remember to “beehive” yourself and not take too much, so as to not upset our flying friends (Darrell, we’re all wishing you a speedy recovery!).
Anyway, that’s enough “droning” on from me.
Bee seeing you! -hr
You cannot stop her. Prepare for bees.
That Oprah meme has evolved huh
"I like my women like I like my coffee... COVERED IN BEES!"
Does this fetish have a name? Just so I can explicitely avoid it.
oviposition
Not (to my knowledge) a fetish , just an Eddie Izzard line from the aptly named stand up special Glorious 😁
Why would you want to stop her? Don't you want the bee crisis to be resolved?
Big if true
Does she have dogs with bees in their mouths and when they bark bees fly out?
Smithers, release the hounds.
Release the robotic Richard Simmons.
Ugh I read "orifice" instead of "office" at first.
Is that a dealbreaker?
I wouldn't wish harm on the bees, maybe bees is a product name for a vibrator though. If it's not it should be.
Not the Bees!
Does she work at Applebees?
Only if the bees are strictly proprietary and designed to stop working after a few years.
Mandatory bees nutz
Later that very same year, on International Bring a Shit-Ton of Bees to Work Day
https://youtube.com/watch?v=PYtXuBN1Hvc&si=T9Ri-aaA7KWYS5a3
Here is an alternative Piped link(s): https://piped.video/watch?v=PYtXuBN1Hvc&
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I'm open-source, check me out at GitHub.
I feel we have made a terrible mistake!
Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
https://piped.video/hBZmQdFbVcY?si=U3z1f4hEkjl4uwJk
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I'm open-source, check me out at GitHub.
She can put bees in my office wink wink
We have top men working on it. Top. Men.
But yeah we probably can't stop her.
Are they the ones in charge of the British clothing chain?
No, but their weapon is strong against Shadow Man (kinda useless in every other situation, though.)
Pickle status update: buoyant
Thank you
RTO is getting weird
I think it's an offer