Songwhip: The Charlie Daniels Band - Long Haired Country Boy

Songwhip: Gift of Gab - So So Much

Songwhip: Alien Ant Farm - These Days

Songwhip: Johnny Madcap and The Distractions - Daly City Train

Both are my cats but this is about the black one, Rowena. She’s 7 years old now and we got her as a rescue at 5. She seemed to settle right in at home but she looked lonely so a couple months later we got him, Colby Jack. He is both named after and literally a cheese, orange cats are truly something else. When we rescued her we were told she had just had kittens so we figured she would be a perfect match for the little guy who lost his mom too soon. He’s about 2.5 months old in that picture.

For about a month Rowena ignored both my partner and I, we existed only to feed or scoop her poop. She would hiss, growl and generally not be nice to him so when after 30 days she finally started to accept him we were pretty relieved. Only lasted until he outgrew her and could bully her back, pay back for a month of terror. We weren’t sure if they would ever get along but after about 2 years they can finally play together and share space. They might not snuggle anymore but we’ll take what we can get.

Today I was walking from the living room to the kitchen and there’s this box filled with toys that we got when we brought Colby Jack home. He likes trash; twist ties, bottle caps and rings really any bits of plastic and paper is his jam so that box of toys has been sitting there unused for a long time. Rowena is just staring deep into it. I’ve caught her looking at it wistfully before but I figured if she wanted anything in there she’d just fish it out.

She has this stare she’ll give you, it pierces your soul. She only does this when she wants something, usually to sit in your lap. She will look you in the eye then at your lap, then meet your gaze and look at your lap again. It’s at this point she expects you to acknowledge her need for pets and warmth which is done by reaching out to pet her.

There’s this fabric toy that looks like a Chinese finger trap with feathers sticking out the ends sitting on top. She notices me noticing her and she gives me the stare, first at me then the box and then again. I don’t speak cat but that seemed like communication to me so I grabbed the toy and handed it her. She immediately snatched and went ham like it was the greatest thing since catnip.

Greater part of two years she’s wanted that toy but it wasn’t until it was given to her that she thought she could have it. Cats are a mystery. I’ve dumped out the box of toys, she could only be happier if she was in a field of sleeping mice.

edit: for non-Americans Colby-Jack Cheese

It was my American Literature teacher, that haggard old fuck how I wished I could have been there to see her face when she got fired for striking a student over something petty, I can only imagine it was a lot like the look she gave me when I thanked her for her words but better. She didn't like my paper over whatever we were reading, Thoreau probably. I take the critique as seriously now as I did then. Greatly flattering.

For brevity, which when I am reminded to be incapable of; prides me instead of delivering a bruising jab, and to underscore my points.

Purple prose is flowery and ornate writing that makes a piece of text impenetrable. It is characterized by long sentences, multi-syllabic words, excessive emotion, and a plethora of clichés. It's typically melodramatic and often too poetic.

In a nutshell, me. As a non-native English speaker this is the greatest honor that has been bestowed upon me and I accept it with much gusto. I am honored that the way I convey my thoughts is as foreign and alienating as I feel, have felt, will continue to feel. I am glad that my voice conveys and does not betray my nature. That in absorbing this text you experience a part of me and for the moment we truly share in this intimately. I don't blame you if you don't find the sensation altogether pleasant and if what I have to say jives, we vibe and good or bad thank you for your time.

Couldn't turn it off even if I wanted. I can't stop breathing.

Back to my American Literature teacher, she really only had the American Public school system to blame. Give you two guesses where I spent meal-times and periods of recreation. Yes obviously and that's right the classics. I wouldn't tell you her name and I can't because I don't remember and won't be bother to look it up, not going to admit to how long that memory is either but it is well worn and faded. I'll paint that picture anyhow, the wry smile and gleam in her eye when she was finally ready to release the stored venom when I asked what she meant that my prose was purple.

The worst compliment I have ever received was being compared to John Lennon. Talk about a bolt out the blue to where you store the feels. Fucker.

Share with me a time an insult warmed your heart or a compliment shattered your perception.

tldr; if you have encountered me before and did not like me then, you won't like me now. I still encourage you to say hi, I hate an echo chamber.

You identify a problem, you then call the attention of your family, friends and peers and really anyone who will listen to your rantings and ravings. After which if enough people support your claim to give confidence of legitimacy, you voice your concerns to authority. Or governing body or anyone that has been designated for the responsibility of resolving issues that arise within the realm of the aforementioned wrinkle in the rug. Only in the direst of need would would you and your conglomeration of dissatisfied citizenry shout, picket or otherwise raise a ruckus to your needs but life is such that needs be great at times. Go figure.

No, typically your movement starts with a letter campaign, phone calls and emails. If you're real lucky you might get a tête-à-tête with someone and if you're doubly lucky, on your way to resolution. It doesn't go down like that for most causes, most of the time it's all but ignored. Fear not seekers of change there is a way to avoid a fizzle out, get more people to join. Of course you could jump straight to hard disruption of daily life but letter writing, emails and phone calls are considered good places to start. Needs be great though and ignorance is willful and bliss. About now is a good time for ye ol' controlled rabble rousing... (it's a joke) but good intentions don't account for the actions of others though property damage doesn't trump a just cause. The bill on justification will come due and I expect to be satisfied. Feelings on rainbows don't meet my admittedly meager standards on letting your opinion be known, not that anyone asked.

There's not much recourse for your average person if the effects of your stance did not sway affections, unless that person is a multi-billion dollar corporation (cuz come on guys, corpos are people too) then you just drown the problem in money until it's buried or washed away to become someone else's problem. Most people are left with a problem unresolved and a pain in their chest that's not from the cuts, bruises or contusions that can accompany making your displeasure publicly known.

I would like to take this moment to tell you how stupid anyone is that intends to create change with the destruction of life that is not their own. I make an exception for self-immolation. If you believe in your cause so strongly that your only option is to extinguish your own flame in a dazzling display of sheer will. You get my respect for your force of determination if not your cause. The only 72 things anyone else gets though is in being blasted to 72 different dimensions of pain and shrapnel and good riddance too.

That is all to say that if you can't pay and you won't choose violence what other avenue is left to pursue?

Stop the machinations that allow people to remain willfully ignorant of the problem. I am sorry that you might be late to work, I'm sorry that couldn't get your triple pump whateverthefuck you're getting in a cup that makes you feel like the emptiness inside isn't so vast, I'm sorry you were delayed running those errands. I'm sorry for your death during a cardiac episode stuck in traffic. I am sorry. But to the point where your life has to stop in its tracks so you will listen, it's important. Some person decided to put their own life in danger to warn you that your own and those around you are also in danger. I'm not saying it is not a bitter pill.

Let us not forget that all of this is predicated on the assumption that when the piper cometh those ends were indeed justified by the means. What constitutes a worthy reason is beyond the purview of the arguments I'm laying forth. As for the eggs that are gonna get cracked, I don't mourn the loss of property only loss of life. In the many words I have used, I am saying that there is a reason the right to free speech and assembly are enshrined in places around the world and I believe in that reason. Whether or not those rights are protected in an equal and fair manner is a whole different can of worms.

tldr; I wrote this for amusement and for the play on words, doesn't mean I don't believe it. By default I care more about my own bodily waste than I'm going to care about your reactionary opinion. Exceptions will be made for adding to the conversation, upgrade to better-than-what-I'm-scooping-out-of-the-litter-boxes-at-home levels of interest.

I thank you for joining me in this ramble. Have a wonderful day.

edit: just want to give a couple special shoutouts, I won’t name names but you’ll know if I’m talking about you. First, to my peeps that are taking this personally, offensively or otherwise as an insult; fucking good, you need to face uncomfortable topics more often and I’m glad I could be there for you and share in this together. Second, to my peeps who found themselves vindicated in their original positions; the same to you as the first group. This has absolutely been my pleasure so thank you if you voted or voiced an opinion. Going to sleep for now but if you call me back to this topic with something good I’ll try to catch you in the morning.

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