P00ptart

"oh fuck fuck fuck fuck"

I think you know where to go to find your people. There's 2 socials I can think of off the top of my head that'll be right up your alley!

That last part means he was a bored soldier in the middle east, with no use for it, just playing with the tracking instruments.

I didn't know Russia could look that beautiful! 😍🤣

The "knife" they mysteriously haven't been able to find?

They never found a knife. They claim someone picked it up and left with it in the chaos, which is obviously bullshit. "I'm gonna ignore the cops flagrantly firing into a crowd in my direction to go pick up that free knife"

Bambalance!

I'm a walking unprofitable for-profit prison.

By the colonel, in the kitchen, with a giant vibrator.

MORTAL KOMBAT!!!

Lmfao! God damnit, now I can expect to see that all over the Internet in a month and a half. "Mothman puts pistols in candy!"

Honestly, id do just about anything to see him fight Putin, or the zuck. Id do even more to make it a hardcore match, and even more if it was a thunder dome match with Putin and zuck vs Elon and Trump.