When you realize that nobody is watching your insta story piecing together your lore the way people do with FNAF games
Wendy_Pleakley
joined 1 month ago
Why is androgyny so attractive tho ๐ง
I struggle with this sort of thing myself. It's like I'll see someone and find them so instantly attractive that I lock up and don't know how to proceed socially. I usually end up feeling guilty, like I'm staring too much. I felt like it was a male gaze thing for the longest time.
For me some of it is envy vs. attraction, am I into them or do I want to look like them? I'm not always sure, and it could be both or neither. I'm attracted to guys, but women catch my eye more.
I've lost my own point! In any case, whoever experiences this, I sympathize, because I am still trying to understand my own tendencies to be awkward around the beautiful people
I mean, not with this.
I can ask someone to move their car if it's blocking me in. I can ask someone how they are. I can ask someone if something they said is really true.
But, like, what I need from other people? I don't know what I need from other people. People aren't consistent, so how does one depend on them? How can you establish needs when the people you need ghost you or misunderstand you?
spoiler
Asking someone, "Can you help me navigate my gender dysphoria?" or "Can you always reassure me and I always reassure you?" or "Can you be my Gender Friend?" feels different than that, though. Maybe it's the neurodivergence but I'm really caught up over at what point I'm burdening others by simply recounting things that have happened. I get so many mixed messages everywhere I go and nobody actively encourages me to speak my mind.
So I stay quiet. It feels like I'd only be speaking up to say "I'm queer and you need to stop not texting me", because that's what I'd be doing. I don't know how to give myself that, or if that's anything to want at all.
I'm not trying to defend my thoughts, I'm trying to understand why I keep hitting dead ends. Idk I know I'm a mess
She's not a girl
who misses much
dudududududooo
oh yeah
She wants encouragement to speak up and ask questions and that's not something we're prepared to do
yeah idk anymore lol
feeling the darkness or whatever
*I try to see the glass as half full,
But I'd probably just drink that too~!*
Will Wood's discography doing the work of multiple therapists during my commute
It does suck.
If I knew what to ask, if I knew where to start, I'd have done that. I'm not a Question Wizard.
I get the impression that most people don't get caught in moral quandaries that cause them to retreat from the world in a state of emotional overwhelm
But I do get caught in this assumption that if I explain myself perfectly then it'll click and somebody will see me as I truly am
I also don't get how people ask questions without being scared
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when you can't decide what to eat so you just don't eat ๐ซ