Thanks for confirming I'm not alone in this, and sorry you've experienced the same.
People tend to think marriage breakdowns happen for obvious reasons, like infidelity, laziness, just losing interest. It's scary to think that you can tick all the right boxes but it can all fall apart anyway, because we as individuals can fall apart.
We need to do so much more for mental health support.
There were no obvious reasons. An accumulation of life factors, like deaths in the family and job insecurity, led us both into a detached survival state, and her survival instinct is to run. There wasn't much warning, and it happened when I was away for a family event.
This hit me so hard that I bet everything on giving her space to see what she was missing and find the way back. That turned into years of no contact. When we did eventually get in touch again, it was clear that I made a mistake. Life had not been easy for her. We had both likely been going through some kind of breakdown, not knowing the other was experiencing the same.
We're now very close again in a lot of ways. I think it's fair to say we're more honest and trusting with each other than anyone else. We've both grown and matured significantly.
Unfortunately, distance from her family, and I sense some guilt over the whole thing has made it hard to fully reconcile. Now we're on opposite sides of the world. She's still struggling but determined to tick off some big life goals. It's no secret that I would go back to our old life together in a heartbeat, but having so much already weighing on her makes it difficult to even think about relationships.
I'm not sure what the lesson is there. I guess it's about remembering to look out for our own mental wellbeing, because without it we can't fully look out for those we care about.
I was a very well behaved kid, but somehow got punished multiple times for absolute bullshit reasons.
I think the most inexplicable was when I had changed schools. My old school was strict about sun safety. Hats were expected every time we were outside. The new school was the opposite, not allowing hats to be worn indoors at all, because they were only worn by rebellious kids or something.
I still wore one at lunch out of habit, and because I burn easily. One time I was going from one outdoor area to another, and had to pass through a covered walkway. It would have been 2 seconds under cover, but a teacher saw me. I got detention and my hat was confiscated.
Good thing you didn't use British English, then.
I suspect Corporate Memphis is partly successful because it works with ambiguous skin colours, so it automatically ticks diversity boxes without the artist having to think too hard about representation.
My prediction is that the successor will double down on that. I hope it's cartoony style anthropomorphic animals.
It's the shape of things, too. They have no character.
I was shopping for door knobs recently, because all the knobs in this house are spherical and smooth. They're impossible to grip. We have a disabled person in the house who struggles to turn them. Gloves slip right off.
At the hardware store is an entire aisle full of doorknobs, but nearly all of them are the exact same smooth spherical shape. The rest were ugly rectangular lever styles that work but look very industrial in a home that's mostly natural textures.
Somehow all these brands, finishes, locking features, price ranges, dozens of product variations, and literally only two doorknob shapes. Both so minimalist as to be almost impractical.
I had to settle for the lever style for one door, and just put grip tape on the others.
I have some gear like that, but only because I bought it all cheaply when one of the manufacturers did a warehouse clearance.
Simon Peyton Jones is about as big an expert on programming languages as you can get, and he's on the record as saying Excel is a functional programming language.
I'm on the cusp of X and millennial, so I've been around plenty of both.
Some X's have done well for themselves, but those without a bit of luck and assistance have mostly had to give up on big dreams of housing security and family.
Millennials have had it tougher, but many of them still got there, with a bit more luck and assistance.
It's been a long decline, with the concentration of capital making it harder for most of us every year. The generational divide is just another distraction from class warfare.
I'm surrounded by forestry operations where I live. I can't go anywhere without getting stuck behind a logging truck on winding and often slippery broads. It's amazing how complacent I've become with these things.
Should have been a sack of doorknobs.
I hope everyone turns up in clown costumes.