this post was submitted on 12 Aug 2024
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chapotraphouse

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I got a bachelors degree in mechanical engineering from a ‘good school’ and yet I never got a good entry level job in the field so I was just wandering the wastelands for a long while before I got a good corporate bullshit job from which I got fired after 3 years and now I have no actual engineering skills and tens of thousand in college debt

I’m 33 and live with my parents and I’m in this constant cycle of living with them until I find a good job in some far away city. They live in a remote place where the only jobs available are 7.50 and yet the living costs are absurd so really, you’re pretty much working just to work. The problem is I can’t move out and do human things such as live by own and have a meaningful because I need a decent salary to survive, and that can only happen if I get something in a far away big city. I don’t want to have to fend for peanuts living paycheck to paycheck(i’ve already tried that a couple of times) in some rathole in a city but I also hate living with my parents so I’m forced in an all or nothing mindset where I need to have a decent salary. I wish I could just take a low wage jobs in some other city but the logistics don’t allow me to.

I feel like I’m rambling, I just feel incredibly stuck, my social life and dating lives are nonexistent and I’m completely fucking broke. I just masturbate all day in my parents house. I have a degree that should be lucrative according to this shitass society, I’m not the archetype of a basement dwelling reddit loser because I do have drive and have moved from place to place and worked and clawed my way through life and stay fit and know how to talk to women and I constantly feel like I shouldn’t be where I’m at but…I kind of am a fucking loser.

Experience shows me that, I guess, this too shall pass and I should land on my feet but god damn I’m regressing constantly and every aspect of my life can’t be moved forward if Instay with my parents in this town. Sorry to rant

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[–] hogslayer@hexbear.net 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (6 children)

similar position here.

I'm 34, no degree, haven't worked in 8 years (just got approved for Disability this February for mental health reasons, so I get like $1500 per month which conveniently is average monthly rent here).

I never got to experience a dating life, or even have a FWB or anything. And I don't see how I ever will. It's so hard to get anywhere or do anything, and at my age nobody will even want to sleep with me unless I "have my shit together". Like it doesn't matter who I am, it only matters my future financial prospects and being someone to brag about. Especially on dating sites.

I live with an abusive, emotionally unstable grandparent that I dream of being able to move away from, but rent prices are just too fucking high and I don't know anyone else in this stupid world who could help me.

I'm just so fucking depressed about my dating life prospects. I recently met a girl on some dating site who is also on Disability for mental health reasons (nice to know she also wouldn't judge me for it). We were talking every day for like 4 months, but she suddenly started soft-ghosting me and I don't know why. Probably nothing this good will ever happen to me again -- and it was barely even anything. I'm in good shape but obviously no car + no job + on disablity pay + live at home => nobody will ever want me, not even just for a FWB/no commitment type of thing sadness-abysmal

[–] tamagotchicowboy@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago (5 children)

Don't be so hard on yourself, keep putting yourself out there you may still find someone, it won't be Hollywood or conventional, but it will be something.

One day I'm going to do the everyone is wanted post, but it probably should be a badpost since how...off I realize it sounds typed or said outloud.

[–] hogslayer@hexbear.net 3 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Don't be so hard on yourself, keep putting yourself out there you may still find someone, it won't be Hollywood or conventional, but it will be something.

I don't see how. I've been using dating sites for years and that was the closest thing to a thing I ever had, and even this one fizzled out.

where am I going to find a woman who doesn't think no car + no job + living at home in my 30's is a deal-breaker?

[–] MidnightPocket@hexbear.net 2 points 2 months ago

yes, the golden age of "dating apps" is long over. They are monetized to hell and back now. Most of the profiles are bots or scammers. The "real" ones are typically not great people. I'm not sure what your disability entails, but public spaces are where you will find genuine people.

If you absolutely insist on using dating apps, try Hinge.

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