The Onion

4565 readers

602 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 2 years ago

MODERATORS

seahorse@midwest.social

pbrisgreat@midwest.social

760

Is America Ready for a President Who Can Convert a Word Document to a PDF? (thehardtimes.net)

submitted 2 months ago by ZeroCool@slrpnk.net to c/theonion@midwest.social

64 comments fedilink hide all child comments

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] NounsAndWords@lemmy.world 32 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Obama, Carter, and (somehow) Teddy Roosevelt

[–] dditty@lemm.ee 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

For sure Obama could convert a Word doc no problem. Hell, ~~Cheney~~ Bush Jr. probably could've as well.

[–] OpenStars@discuss.online 27 points 2 months ago (1 children)

With his youthful, tech-savvy vibe, many assumed that Barack Obama knew this stuff. But when pressed about how to convert file types, he responded, “What do I look like, some kinda fuckin’ nerd?” His honesty was refreshing. After all, converting a file shouldn’t be the president’s job. That is what interns are for. (Recent surveys show 90% of interns’ work hours are spent combining, condensing, and converting documents in a way that doesn’t crash the aging government servers.)

[–] DJDarren@thelemmy.club 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

He does not, in fact, look like some kinda fuckin’ nerd.

[–] OpenStars@discuss.online 8 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

I mean... kinda (a hot one:-)?

Edit: receipt:

Conclusion: nerds rule, conservatives drool 🤤!

[–] Cock_Inspecting_Asexual@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I wanna fight you for this statement.

but I have deadass nothing to fight you with

how dare you make me realize Obama is attractive >:( /hj

[–] OpenStars@discuss.online 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It's okay, you must still be recovering from that coma that you simply must have been in for 8 years to have missed this hot bod:

Michelle forgives you though, bc she now has this hunk of man meat all to herself finally, and therefore so do I:-).

Also, we can be so easily distracted these days by...

Wait, what were we talking about now? :-P

[–] Cock_Inspecting_Asexual@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

STAHP–

YOU FIEND!!!

[–] OpenStars@discuss.online 1 points 2 months ago

Okay I will stop (but those images have now been seared into your soul:-)

[–] taiyang@lemmy.world 10 points 2 months ago

To be fair, Teddy only managed to convert to PDF by sheer gumption. No matter how many clippies he faced, he never gave up, never crashed his Word, and always disabled OneDrive before anything else.

[–] leftzero@lemmynsfw.com 8 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Roosevelt didn't convert word documents to PDF. He edited the PDF directly, with a hex editor.

[–] sfbing@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

"Bully!"

[–] dch82@lemmy.zip 3 points 2 months ago

"Back in my day..."