this post was submitted on 11 Feb 2025
577 points (96.6% liked)

Not The Onion

13324 readers
2736 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

It is real!

https://buddycarter.house.gov/news/documentsingle.aspx?DocumentID=15398

Rep. Earl L. “Buddy” Carter (R-GA) released the following statement today after introducing a bill authorizing President Trump to acquire Greenland and renaming it Red, White, and Blueland:

“America is back and will soon be bigger than ever with the addition of Red, White, and Blueland. President Trump has correctly identified the purchase of what is now Greenland as a national security priority, and we will proudly welcome its people to join the freest nation to ever exist when our Negotiator-in-Chief inks this monumental deal.”

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] snekerpimp@lemmy.world 131 points 1 day ago (7 children)

WHAT ABOUT MY FUCKING EGG PRICES YOU GERIATRIC FUCK?!?!

[–] Empricorn@feddit.nl 1 points 15 hours ago

They. Don't. fucking. Care.

Not blasting you, just a reminder for all of us. This was the end goal of a nationwide unified propaganda apparatus (Fox News, etc), pretending to work in the interests of workers, stealing Supreme Court seats, stoking hate/division, and implementing Project 2025. It worked. They have all 3 branches of government, are deleting knowledge and resources, decimating Congress-approved departments they don't like, deleting knowledge and resources, and wiping their asses with the Constitution they ignore. It's still worth resisting and fighting them every step of the way to fascism,I just hope it will be enough...

[–] tootoughtoremember@lemmy.world 3 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago)

Best I can do is a new global pandemic. But with no public information from Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and without working with the World Health Organization.

[–] AtariDump@lemmy.world 14 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] Late2TheParty@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Ooohhh! Thank you for these!

[–] tal 31 points 1 day ago

"He isn't paying attention to the jingly keys."

"Find something more-outrageous to say. We'll get there."

[–] radix@lemmy.world 17 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I'm sorry, eggs come from female chickens, and any talk of that particular F-word is strictly forbidden.

[–] anomnom@sh.itjust.works 2 points 22 hours ago

I give it another 2 weeks before they start saying that omelets are just chicken abortions.

[–] UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 day ago

Fork this bullshut

[–] towelie@lemmy.world 14 points 1 day ago (4 children)

My partner and I moved into an eco village and are going to buy chickens this summer. Blew my mind to learn a live chicken only costs $75

[–] snekerpimp@lemmy.world 22 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I can buy chicks from the tractor supply a half mile from my house for $4.99 a piece. They have multiple breeds there too. Been contemplating that investment for awhile…

[–] Anne@lemmy.world 15 points 1 day ago (2 children)

You should go for it, raising chickens is surprisingly easy and they are a hoot to watch frolicking around your yard.

However, fuck Tractor Supply for rolling back their DEI initiatives Search for local hatcheries to buy your chicks. Last spring, I bought ten pre-sexed female chicks (which, admittedly comes with the ethical concerns of what they do with the males) of random "designer" breeds for only $95 including shipping.

[–] snekerpimp@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Everyone in my family is for it, as long as I’m the one that takes care of their end of life… that has been why I haven’t gone through with it yet lol

[–] Anne@lemmy.world 11 points 1 day ago

It is so hard when you lose one of the flock, and foxes, weasels, raccoons, whatever predators are in your area can smell them for miles and will snatch one eventually. But, for all the sobbing beside a pile of feathers I have done, I still wholeheartedly recommend that you go for it!

[–] Maeve@kbin.earth 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

What kinds of designers? We had some designer chickens, they were delightful.

[–] Anne@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Right now we have three orpingtons, two brahma, one cochin, three golden comets, two marans, two plymouth rock, one silkie bantam, two sussex, and one wyandotte.

I had more bantams but they are really really good jumpers because they're so small and light, they can nearly fly, and they would insist on roosting in a tree... Their steadfast refusal to come in at night ended in their demise.

[–] Maeve@kbin.earth 1 points 1 day ago

Oh dear, for the banties! Silkies, sizzles and frizzles are so cuddly. Had a ~~cooper~~ copper maran that was my baby, though. I really miss them all, except the mean Rhode Island bully. Enjoy your babies, they are smart and loyal.

Autocorrect is so fun!

[–] cokeslutgarbage@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I get them from the farm lady down the street for like twelve bucks, she even let's me pick out the one I want, who sold you a single chicken for $75? Shame on them.

[–] towelie@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I neglected to mention in the comment that the chickens I'm looking at are of the Ayam Cemani breed, which are pure black, including their organs. They're pretty coveted, so I was surprised that even those are very cheap!

[–] cokeslutgarbage@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Oh yeah that's a great deal for one of those hahah

Have a great day and a wonderful life with your cool bird

Xx

[–] volvoxvsmarla@lemm.ee 9 points 1 day ago

I saw someone on the German equivalent to Craigslist selling a rooster for 5€ today. Said they had three home grown roosters and that's too many. It's a full grown rooster. I am both surprised that this is so cheap and that it's legal to just sell roosters like a second hand iPod.

[–] Maeve@kbin.earth 8 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Wait until you supplement feeding and have to worm them.

[–] conditional_soup@lemm.ee 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Tbh, feeding them is cheap if you supply them with table scraps. They're basically feathered pigs.

[–] Maeve@kbin.earth 5 points 1 day ago

That's true. We had a lot of chickens a long time ago, not enough table scraps, though. We kept them penned most of the time for their protection from natural predators, including our cat.

[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Chickens are simple easy and cheap. Source: I own chickens and it's not the first time

30 dozen eggs a month for ~$18 per month. (Is my current set up). Initial investment is really all, which isn't high if you have scrap wood laying around somewhere

[–] Maeve@kbin.earth 4 points 1 day ago

We had a lot of chickens at one time, they got expensive for reasons I mentioned. But we had a lot, of varying different kinds.

[–] possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 5 points 1 day ago

Stonks!

  • egg companies