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Got married. 0/10 would not recommend.
Tell us the tale?
I'll spare the details and just give you the highlights:
Heed my words, dudes: if you must have a joint checking account, have your direct deposit go to an account only in your name. I didn't and she cleaned me out to buy crack.
Were there any red flags or did she change after marriage?
That's the thing about abusive relationships, when you're in them long enough you're often manipulated to the point where the abuser makes you think your actions are the problem. Making me question reality, and myself was her modus operandi. Looking back yeah, there were plenty of red flags, but I also had such a low opinion of myself I accepted the kind of relationship I felt I deserved, until she pushed me past my breaking point. Having a kid also complicated matters; seemed like that was a major turning point in her narcissistic abusive descent. Then you sprinkle on a little sunk cost fallacy and you've got a recipe for disaster.
Agreed. Last boss just kept droning on and on for a decade